I Hate You—Don't Leave Me by Jerold J. Kreisman

Author:Jerold J. Kreisman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Group USA, Inc.
Published: 2010-10-21T16:00:00+00:00

Contending with Borderline Rage

After a while, for someone close to a borderline, unpredictable behaviors may become commonplace and therefore “predictably unpredictable.” One of the most common, the angry outburst, usually comes with no warning and appears way out of proportion.

The close friend, relation, or coworker should resist the temptation to “fight fire with fire.” The louder and angrier the borderline gets, the quieter and more composed the other person should become, thereby refusing to collaborate in aggravating the emotional atmosphere, and spotlighting the comparative outlandish intensity of the borderline’s rage. If the concerned individual senses the potential for physical violence, he should leave the scene immediately. Borderline rage often cannot be reasoned with, so discussion and debate are unnecessary and may only inflame the situation. Instead, one should try to cool off the conflict by acknowledging the difference in opinion and agreeing to disagree. Further discussion can come later when the atmosphere is more settled.

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