How to Be Your Own Therapist by Owen O'Kane

Author:Owen O'Kane [O’Kane, Owen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2022-05-15T00:00:00+00:00

4. Showing up in your life authentically

In a society that’s obsessed with creating the illusion of perfect lives, perfect bodies, perfect relationships, perfect teeth and so on, I propose a different route. Simply show up unapologetically as you are.

I wholeheartedly believe that when we try to create an illusion that is at odds with who we are, we weaken our position. People sense inauthenticity immediately. We can feel it when we are around people who aren’t sincere or genuine. If an authentic approach doesn’t get you what you want, perhaps you are on the wrong path. If you dilute, minimise, or fabricate who you are, you compromise your integrity and the foundations supporting you.

I remember once being advised by a friend not to talk too much about my own struggles in book interviews because ‘People don’t want advice from a therapist who has struggled.’ I disagreed and chose not to adapt my approach. I am good at my job partly because I personally have known, and I understand, human struggle. Why would I hide that? The best professionals in health and psychology are often those people who have walked the walk.

I’m not advocating that you shouldn’t strive for self-improvement. Personal growth can fulfil you and help to augment those aspects of your personality and identity that make you special and unique. All I ask is that you avoid the trap of believing you need to be different from what you are. You don’t.

Commit to your authentic self. It won’t let you down.

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