F.A.R.T. Attack! by Peter Bakalian

Author:Peter Bakalian
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Aladdin
Published: 2023-08-08T00:00:00+00:00

At this point, you could hear the crowd shouting—some for Lola and against the Brain Modem, and others for Stig, but ultimately, one steady chant rose in volume above all others: “Brain Modem! Brain Modem! Brain Modem! Brain Modem! Brain Modem! Brain Modem!”

PARENT #7: Stig! When will the Brain Modem be ready?

STIG PLUNGER: We’re on the verge of a breakthrough in its size. I think it’ll be ready—

RECORDING ENDS

Bub clicked off his phone. “Sorry, that’s all I got.”

“Did Stig say anything else about the Brain Modem?” I asked.

Crabapple looked up from her note-taking. “Like when it would be ready?”

“Nope. What’s a Brain Modem anyway?” he asked.

“Do you have kids?” asked Crabapple.

“Nope.”

“Then you wouldn’t be interested.”

Bub returned to stacking chairs, and we set off for Squid Kids. What else could we do?

Halfway across the hotel parking lot, Banana stopped and slapped his head. “Shouldn’t we get that recording from Bub?”

In the short time it took us to return to the ballroom, Bub had vanished. Odder still, a hotel employee who entered after us said that she had never heard of a “Bub.”

I thanked her before Crabapple could put up a fuss, and ushered the three of us out. I was used to phantoms like Bub appearing and disappearing when F.A.R.T. was involved. Today was no different.

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