Due Process by Lynn Burke

Author:Lynn Burke [Burke, Lynn]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Author Lynn Burke

“What’s on your mind, angel?” Silas murmured against Troy’s hair. “I can hear the gears grinding inside your head.”

They snuggled in bed, freshly showered, Silas the big spoon as usual. The warmth of the hard chest against Troy’s back comforted in a way he’d never felt with anyone but Silas.

But the clenching in his stomach kept him from relaxing.

He wanted to cling to that sense of belonging and safety. Grasp hold of Silas’s acceptance and never let go like he’d done after the shooting, but…

“Troy.”

Exhaling loudly, Troy closed his eyes, shutting out Silas’s dimmed bedroom that felt more like home than his rented one.

“When I was a senior in high school…” Troy had to stop and fill his lungs again as the fear of rejection slid through his veins and chilled his blood despite the warm cocoon they lay in.

Silas slid his leg between Troy’s thigh and squeezed him tighter, the steady cadence of his heart beating against Troy’s back.

“My science t-teacher…I crushed on him. Hard. And he noticed. Rather than drawing lines between us like he should have done with a starstruck kid, he encouraged my blatant flirting.” Cold sweat beaded on Troy’s forehead.

Silas didn’t shift, his steady exhales bathing the top of Troy’s head with warmth and giving him the courage to continue.

“We exchanged numbers, and through the rest of third quarter, we texted. Sent p-pictures of…you know.” Troy expelled a shaky breath. “He told me he loved me, couldn’t wait until I turned eighteen in May…I’m sure you get the idea.”

His stomach churned as he pushed against his memory’s flashing images. The handsome smile that had first captured his attention. Laughing eyes full of warmth and teasing. Murmured words meant to entice.

At one time, they had all filled his heart with flutters, but he’d learned the hard way how a man’s arrogance led to deception.

“What happened, angel?” Silas’s voice soothed rather than demanded he continue.

Troy inhaled until it hurt before speaking the rest. The shit that had come after the buildup of what he’d thought had been a beautiful thing.

“The night I turned eighteen, I snuck out of my parent’s house and went to his apartment. I was more than willing and ready to have my fantasies fulfilled, my virginity given up to the man who claimed to love me more than life.”

A sense of choking tightened his throat, and Troy opened his eyes, blinking into focus the bureau against the wall. He reminding himself of where he was, his reality in that moment, to keep from reliving that terrifying night. His teacher couldn’t touch him, wasn’t there in the bedroom with him and Silas.

“He got rough,” Troy whispered, wishing for numbness rather than the rawness bleeding through his voice. “Held me down—freaked me the fuck out.” Troy blew out a tension-ridden exhale, wishing he could rid his mind as easily.

“You changed your mind.”

Troy nodded at Silas’s murmur.

“Yes.” He swallowed audibly, but the sense of helplessness still haunted him, still twisted his stomach. “but he didn’t stop.”

Silas cursed, his body going rigid.

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