And God Created Cricket by Simon Hughes

Author:Simon Hughes
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Transworld
Published: 2008-12-31T16:00:00+00:00

The Tru(e)th Hurts

Sobers, like most of the greats, was never coached. He was left alone to find his own way. There is a delicious irony in the manner England’s number one match-winner of the time was handled. Fred Trueman, who weighed 14lb 1oz at birth, was always larger than life, and controversy followed him around like a bad smell. He was ill-disciplined in the West Indies, criticizing umpires and acting stroppily, and on tour he could be tactless. In Sydney an Australian official asked him politely what he thought of ‘our bridge’. ‘Your bridge?’ Trueman snorted. ‘Our bloody bridge you should say – bugger it – a Yorkshire firm – Dorman and Long – built it – and you bastards still ain’t paid for it!’

His anti-establishment attitude caused him to be omitted from touring parties. This did not justify the embarrassing scene at his home ground at Headingley when the chairman of selectors, Gubby Allen, laid down a handkerchief in the nets and made him try and hit it in front of a large crowd. He found the incident utterly humiliating but for once kept his counsel.

Perhaps subconsciously it drove Trueman on. Or maybe it was just a general hatred of batsmen (and anyone not from Yorkshire). Trueman’s favourite antic was to pop his head round the opposition dressing room door before going out to field. He’d canvass the room for past victims and greenhorns. ‘Awreet, I can see five or six wickets for FST today,’ he’d crow and stride out. Sometimes he’d be the last one on to the field, advising the steward not to bother shutting the gate after the incoming batsmen: ‘Woon o’ them’ll be back soon!’ he’d exclaim in their earshot. He was fond of knocking out the stumps of anybody wearing unnecessary adornments like cravats or stripy caps and dismissing them with ‘It were hardly worth gettin’ dressed, wor it?’

During overs he had a nice selection of one-liners including, after countless streaky shots, advising, ‘You’ve got more edges than a broken pisspot! And wi’ next ’un I’ll pin thee to flippin’ sightscreen.’ His Middlesex opponent J. J. Warr said, ‘If Fred was fined £200 every time he swore he’d have financed the national debt.’ His bowling doctrine was simple: ‘Use every weapon within the rules and stretch the rules to breaking point!’ But his reputation for Anglo-Saxon comment and bristling demeanour, earning him the nickname ‘Fiery’, overlooks the fact that Trueman was a brilliant and versatile bowler. He generated genuine pace from his surging run and colossal miner’s shoulders and would make the ball swing away late with his side-on, slightly slingy action. John Arlott described his delivery as ‘like a storm-wave breaking on a beach, and he followed through with so mighty a heave that the knuckles of his right hand swept the ground.’

There was an intensity about Trueman’s bowling – using well-directed bouncers and yorkers followed up with 1,000-yard stares – that made all but the stoutest batsmen buckle. He had a colossal physical presence.

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