A Woman Killed With Kindness by Thomas Heywood

Author:Thomas Heywood [Kidnie, Thomas Heywood and Margaret Jane]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781408151969
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
Published: 2017-06-12T00:00:00+00:00

Enter Mistress [ANNE] Frankford, Master WENDOLL, Master CRANWELL, NICK, and JENKIN, with cards, carpet, stools, and other necessaries.

O you are a stranger, Master Cranwell, you,

And often balk my house; faith, you are a churl.

115 Now we have supped, a table, and to cards.

JENKIN A pair of cards, Nicholas, and a carpet to cover

the table. Where’s Cicely with her counters and her box?

Candles and candlesticks there!

[Enter CICELY and a Servingman with counters and candles.]

Fie, we have such a household of serving creatures –

120 unless it be Nick and I, there’s not one amongst them all can say boo to a goose. Well said, Nick.

They spread a carpet, set down lights and cards.

ANNE Come, Master Frankford, who shall take my part?

FRANKFORD Marry, that will I, sweet wife.

WENDOLL No, by my faith, sir, when you are together I sit out;

125 it must be Mistress Frankford and I, or else it is no match.

FRANKFORD I do not like that match.

NICK You have no reason, marry, knowing all.

FRANKFORD ’Tis no great matter neither. – Come,

130 Master Cranwell, shall you and I take them up?

CRANWELL At your pleasure, sir.

FRANKFORD I must look to you, Master Wendoll, for

you will be playing false, nay, so will my wife, too.

NICK Ay, I will be sworn she will.

135 ANNE Let them that are taken playing false forfeit the set.

FRANKFORD Content. It shall go hard but I’ll take you.

CRANWELL Gentlemen, what shall our game be?

WENDOLL Master Frankford, you play best at noddy.

FRANKFORD You shall not find it so, indeed, you shall not.

140 ANNE I can play at nothing so well as double ruff.

FRANKFORD If Master Wendoll and my wife be together,

there’s no playing against them at double hand.

NICK I can tell you, sir, the game that Master Wendoll is best at.

145 WENDOLL What game is that, Nick?

NICK Marry, sir, knave out of doors.

WENDOLL She and I will take you at lodam.

ANNE Husband, shall we play at cent?

FRANKFORD My saint’s turned devil. No, we’ll none of cent.

150 You’re best at new-cut, wife, you’ll play at that.

WENDOLL If you play at new-cut, I am soonest hitter of

any here for a wager.

FRANKFORD

’Tis me they play on. Well you may draw out;

For all your cunning, ’twill be to your shame –

155 I’ll teach you at your new-cut, a new game.

Come, come.

CRANWELL

If you cannot agree upon the game,

To post and pair.

WENDOLL

We shall be soonest pairs, and my good host,

160 When he comes late home, he must kiss the post.

FRANKFORD

Whoever wins, it shall be to thy cost.

CRANWELL

Faith, let it be vied-ruff, and let’s make honours.

FRANKFORD

If you make honours, one thing let me crave,

Honour the king and queen, except the knave.

WENDOLL

165 Well, as you please for that. Lift who shall deal.

ANNE

The least in sight. What are you, Master Wendoll?

WENDOLL [cutting the cards]

I am a knave.

NICK I’ll swear it.

ANNE [cutting] I, a queen.

FRANKFORD

A quean thou shouldst say. [cutting] Well, the cards are mine;

They are the grossest pair that e’er I felt.

ANNE

170 Shuffle, I’ll cut – [aside] Would I had never dealt.

FRANKFORD

I have lost my dealing.

WENDOLL Sir, the fault’s in me.

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