A Place of Smoke & Shadows: The Fae Girl by Ellie Sanders

Author:Ellie Sanders [Sanders, Ellie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-06-14T22:00:00+00:00

I spent the next few weeks hiding in my room, only leaving to go to Jelric’s classes, and even then, I kept my head down, kept my pace quick. Ensuring Nela and Indi where there, right beside me at all times.

I had no more thoughts of escape. No more want for it either.

Those awful moments at his hands had shown me exactly what would happen if I tried to escape. Exactly what my life would become. There was no other option for me. No safety beyond the walls of this castle.

I guess from the High King’s perspective it couldn’t have worked out any better. I was truly afraid now. I would never try to leave.

Everyone in the castle knew that something had happened between me and Rillon. And that I was responsible for his and the High Queen’s banishment. I didn’t know how they felt, if they were angry at me, or whether they realised I was a victim in all this.

But the whispers followed me. As much as I tried to ignore them. As much as I tried to block them out.

Perhaps that was why I hid away. That was what I said to justify it. Because I was back to being cowardly Alice again.

Fearful Alice.

Pathetic Alice.

Mira had somehow acquired her own stringlet and we spent hours playing one sad tune after another. None of us spoke about it, none of us seemed to want to even think about it.

“Enough.” Nela said breaking the sad lilt I’d played almost continuously for the last hour.

I looked up, my hands faltering on the strings.

“You need to stop wallowing.” She said.

“I’m not wallowing. I’m…” I started to say.

“Yes you are.” Nela interrupted me. “When what you should be doing is fighting back.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean channel that anger. Channel all that emotion and make yourself stronger, tougher from it.”

“And how exactly do I do that?” I half snapped.

I was angry. I was furious. But I also felt so incredibly vulnerable. How could I make myself tougher when even my magic wasn’t helping? When I’d needed it the most I had nothing, for all Jelric going on about how powerful I was. I didn’t feel powerful. I felt weak. Weak and vulnerable and pathetic and that’s where half of my anger came from too. Not just at what had happened, not just at what Rillon had done or attempted to do, but in reality what could I even do to protect myself and stop someone else trying the same thing?

When it came down to it I was just as defenceless as I had been back at the school. Poor defenceless, pathetic Alice.

“I want to train you.” Nela replied.

“What?”

“I want to train you.” She said again.

“But you’re not Magi.”

Nela gave a little chuckle. “Not in magic. In fighting, so you can defend yourself.”

“Doesn’t it take years to train to be a soldier?” I asked.

“It does. But that’s not what we’d be doing. You’re not joining the army Alice. I’m not going to train you for battle.

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