The Heart of Female Same-Sex Attraction by Janelle Hallman

Author:Janelle Hallman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook
Publisher: IVP Books
Published: 2010-10-30T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER EIGHT

Four Basic Blueprints

Understanding the Various Profiles

The world sets in to making us into what the world would like us to be,

and because we have to survive after all, we try to make

ourselves into something that we hope the world will like better

than it apparently did the selves we originally were.

FREDERICK BUECHNER, TELLING SECRETS

I open the door to my waiting room unsure whether the client waiting will be a man or a woman. The name given on the phone was androgynous, and the voice sounded male, but I have prepared myself to greet a female. My assumptions were right. She is wearing a Mickey Mouse sweatshirt with colored tennis shoes and heavy athletic socks under light blue slacks that don’t match her ensemble. She has a difficult time looking at me, so she watches the floor as she enters my office. Conversation is arduous, but she is finally able to admit she wants help with her relationships. She has no friends.

My next client saunters into my office wearing a man’s white T-shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a leather flight jacket thrown over her shoulder, dark blue extra-long jeans and heavy black boots. I invite her to sit on either couch. She chooses one, turns to face me and literally drops her body free-fall onto the couch. She spreads her legs, leans forward and with a smirk demands, I’m here. Now fix me.

I welcome my next client. She has long, beautiful blond hair and is wearing eye makeup and sensuous, dark lipstick. She has a lovely smile and is dressed in feminine, casual professional clothes. She is friendly, open and engaging. We chat about her day and her drive over to my office. I ask how she feels about starting with a new therapist. She smiles and with much animation replies, “Oh, I don’t feel. I don’t feel anything. It was a real frustration for my last therapist of three years!”

I am at the end of the day, prepared to meet with my final client. I open the door to my waiting room and spot an attractive woman with great taste. As she walks into my office—wearing expensive female sportswear, cool shoes and a stylish short haircut—she smiles but speaks curtly as she hands me the paperwork I had left for her in the waiting room. “I won’t sign this one for personal ethical reasons,” she says, “and just to let you know, if you ask me to end my lesbian relationship, I’ll quit.”

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