Smoke and Sorcery (Noirstar Witch Mysteries Book 1) by Mara Webb

Author:Mara Webb [Webb, Mara]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2024-10-22T00:00:00+00:00

A few minutes later, I arrived at Sharp’s Bazaar. Ramona was seeing a customer when I came in, so I pursued the aisles and made idle chit-chat with Grimalkin while we waited for her business to be over with. I soon got bored of talking with Grimalkin, so I decided to eavesdrop instead while pretending to inspect a row of enchanted mirrors.

“Foghorn Cap?” Ramona said, reading from a list that the man had handed to her.

“Yes, and?” he said rather bluntly. He looked over his shoulder and made eye contact with me briefly before looking away again. “Do you have it?”

“I can get it for you tomorrow. I’ll have to order it from out of town.”

“I thought you were supposed to be the best magic supply shop in town.”

“We are, but Foghorn Cap is quite an unusual item. It’s not used a lot. What’s it for?”

The portly man seemed cagey. He wrinkled his nose and sneered. “What’s that matter?”

“Well, if I know what you’re trying to do, I can maybe suggest an alternative. I can usually guess, but the rest of these ingredients don’t give any clear indication.”

He considered her for a moment. “These supplies are for a variety of spells. The Foghorn Cap is for a lensing solution.”

Lensing solution was a magic liquid mixed together and poured over a magnifying glass laid perpendicular to a table. It was meant to imbue the lens with magical properties and highlight particular… maladies. Most people didn’t know this, but the majority of the time, they were used to diagnose certain diseases in the bathing suit area.

I tried to surpass a snigger as I realized this man was suffering from some sort of malady picked up in the bedroom. He shot another look over his shoulder, his little fat cheeks turning bright pink. “What’s she laughing at?!”

“Nothing,” I spluttered. “Just looking at the enchanted mirrors.”

“Ignore her. She’s the local loon. Look, I can get it for you tomorrow, but Foghorn Cap is outdated for a lensing solution, you’re much better off with⁠—”

“Just order it, and I’ll pick it up tomorrow. I don’t want anything else.” With that, the little fat man snatched his bag of goods off the counter and stormed out of the bazaar. Once the door was shut, I could finally let my laughter out.

“Do you really have to do that?” Ramona asked me.

“What?” I said, feigning ignorance.

“Drive away my customers. It’s bad enough that you’re lurking around in here like the shadow of death. You’re driving away business!”

“It’s not my fault he can’t keep it in his pants. Besides, it’s the twenty-first century. He really ought to know better about practicing safe sex.”

“What are you talking about?” Ramona asked, sounding genuinely clueless. I explained what I suspected the spell was for. She turned a shade of pink and looked down at the counter.

“Ah…”

“Yeah, it’s quite obscure. Like you said, it’s outdated as well. There are much better ways of clearing up those little sins. Or so I’ve heard.”

“I trust you didn’t just come here to make fun of my customers?” she prompted.

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