Simon Lelic by A Thousand Cuts (v5)
Author:A Thousand Cuts (v5)
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Women detectives, Murder, Murder - Investigation, Women detectives - England - London, Modern & contemporary fiction (post c 1945), General, Fiction - General, Mystery fiction, Teachers, School shootings, General & Literary Fiction, Fiction, Teachers - Suicidal behavior
ISBN: 9780330511636
Publisher: Viking
Published: 2010-09-15T04:00:00+00:00
Whatâs your earliest memory?
Iâm not sure either. Iâm on a boat, I think, and Iâm wearing this jumper that I liked. It had a flower on it.
Do you wanna know my earliest memory of Sam?
Heâs pinching me. I was four, I think, maybe five so he would of been seven, I guess, maybe eight. Iâm on my back and heâs got his knees on me and Iâve got one arm free and Iâm hitting him but heâs ignoring it or not feeling it cos heâs focused on my other arm and heâs pinching me here, here, here, all the way up and heâs pinching me and heâs smiling. I remember it clearly. Itâs like it was on the TV just the other night.
He hated me. I hated him but he hated me first. He resented me. Thatâs what Annie says. She says he didnât hate me he resented me but I looked up the word resent and it basically means that he hated me. I knew what resent meant already by the way. Iâm not stupid, I just like to check. I have a dictionary, Annie got it for me, and I like to check what words mean cos sometimes they mean something different from what you think they mean, not a lot always but enough to change what youâre saying when you donât want it to. Do you know what I mean?
Iâm glad cos not everyone does. Some people use words without even caring what they really mean. They just say em and think about what theyâre saying after theyâve finished saying it.
My dad was good at words. Heâs dead now. He drowned. I was ten. But he used to have these books, they were full of puzzles: crosswords and wordsearches and what are those ones where the letters are all mixed up and you have to put em back in the right order? Like on Countdown, at the end, the ones I can never get.
Right. Anagrams. So my dad would sit there every night with one of them books and sometimes heâd let me sit with him, if I was quiet and I didnât wriggle, and Iâd help him or Iâd try to. I could do the wordsearches, I was good at em, but I donât like crosswords, I never liked crosswords. Sam could do crosswords. Sometimes if Dad got stuck he would ask Sam and Sam would say itâs this or itâs that or sometimes he would just shrug but most of the time he would know. Sam went to university in the end. Dad said he would and he did. He shouldnât of though, thatâs what Annie says. He should of stayed with me, thatâs what Annie says. Annie says that if Sam had stayed it would of been better for everyone: me, she says, Sam, she says, her, she says, them kids. But Iâd rather have Annie than him. Iâd of run away if theyâd of made me live with him.
Annie? Annieâs like my mum. Sheâs not my mum but she looks out for me.
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