Relax, It's Just Sex by Leslie Spurr Ph.D

Relax, It's Just Sex by Leslie Spurr Ph.D

Author:Leslie Spurr Ph.D.
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: ABC-CLIO


Seduction

“Seduction isn’t making someone do what they don’t want to do;

Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already.”7

—Benjamin Russell

As compared to the oftentimes lengthy courtship rituals in the traditional singles scene, seduction between couples in the rec sex playrooms is generally very streamlined. Everybody knows what everybody is there for and the question essentially comes down to, “Do you want to do it with us now or with some other couple later?”

“Seduction,” if it even can be called that, can be very rapid and entirely nonverbal. At times, even between strangers, just a first look or a touch can lead directly into very brief foreplay and immediate penetration.

The concept of seduction, by most definitions of the term, generally involves some notion of somebody leading someone else astray. In the rec sex context, at least among experienced participants however, few people could be considered to be persuaded to engage in activities they wouldn’t engage in otherwise.

In these venues, seduction is more focused on the who rather than the what. People attempt to persuade those they find attractive to do the familiar activity with them rather than somebody else.

Successful seduction essentially involves persuading a reluctant possibility to move from a state of unwillingness to one of acceptance. In many ways, this process proceeds much like it does in the well-known singles dating scene, with some notable exceptions.

Most significantly, with four people often involved, seduction can get a bit complex. In the most common scenario, the male of each couple will attempt to prompt willingness on the part of the female of the other couple.

Two couples meeting each other, possibly as first-time prospects, will often initially switch partners for a hug and a brief caress to assess the mutual level of interest in proceeding. Adjourning to a nearby sofa, perhaps, there may be side-by-side seduction attempts unfolding.

Typically, each female will make an independent decision as to whether to take matters to the next level with her prospective suitor. She will most probably be keeping an eye on her primary partner’s progress with his prospect, however. Her decision to proceed or not may be influenced, one way or the other, by her assessment of how likely his liaison is to occur.

There will be one of three outcomes from these parallel seductions. In the most straightforward result, both females may make a go or no-go choice congruently, with appropriate actions following. Then there are the split decisions.

When one of the newly-paired playmates wants to get it on and the other does not, further decisions need to be made. Some primary-partner couples only “play together,” meaning that it has to be a go for both or it doesn’t happen. Others are comfortable allowing each primary partner to play independently.

In the case of the independence-agreement couples, the one pair who wanted to do each other would go off and find an appropriate place to get physical while the other pair might go to the bar or dance floor and simply socialize until their primary partners returned.



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