Raising Kids with Hidden Disabilities by Naomi Simmons

Author:Naomi Simmons
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
Published: 2022-04-21T00:00:00+00:00

CODE GREEN

When our child is in code green, he can hear us, he can talk to us and he can learn. His brain is online and whatever parenting strategy we prefer has a good chance of working.

Nearly all the parenting advice out there is designed for children in code green. So, if we like sticker charts, the ‘naughty’ step, taking away computer games for ‘bad’ behaviour, limiting screen time, encouraging them to learn and study, giving them explanations and everything else we hoped to achieve as a parent, make the most of our child’s time in code green to do it.

When our child is in code green, it may be reasonable to get her to go to school, to do homework, to accept no for an answer and to share her toys. If our child is in a very good place, it is the time to introduce new things and to help her to grow and learn.

Code green is a time to teach social skills and to encourage our child to follow interests. This is when our son may be able to socialise with people he likes and to enjoy learning and following his passions.

Code green is our real child. It is who they really are.

Code green is a big banding and there are many shades of green. As we get more practice with this, we learn to recognise which shade of green our child is at, and what we can reasonably expect from him or her at that time.

Some parents use the lower ends of code green to unpick meltdowns with their child and help them and us to understand what may be triggering them. Saying this, meltdowns and rages can be so shameful for a child that even mentioning them can send them straight back up to code orange or even straight to red. We clearly need to use our instincts and discretion on this, just another of our decoding challenges!

Many children at the higher end of code green are quite close to code orange or will tip into code orange if too many demands are made of them. These children are in protection mode, which was described in detail in the previous chapters.

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