Raising Adventurous Eaters by Lara Dato

Author:Lara Dato
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2022-10-21T20:34:36+00:00

21

Mealtime Misbehaviors

It’s important to remember that children typically misbehave for a reason. Children are learning and testing boundaries; it’s a really important milestone for them to hit. That being said, it can be frustrating when children choose mealtimes (which can already be chaotic) as a time to test those limits. But by identifying the reason behind it, we can help prevent it and know how to deal with it more effectively when it does happen.

Many misbehaviors center around movement and the use of our proprioceptive system, like throwing food, getting up from the table, wiggling around in chairs, and more. Most children are frequently on the move—even more so for “sensory seekers” or children that enjoy a higher amount of proprioceptive input. When children aren’t getting their sensory needs met, they can show that by trying to fulfill them themselves, by moving around in a way that feels good or by acting out in other ways to communicate their feelings of dysregulation.

With the strategies in this chapter, you’ll feel more confident in staying calm through these trying moments and in preventing, managing, and correcting your child’s difficult behaviors.

The first step is to think a bit about why your child is acting out. Children can have tricky behaviors around mealtime for all sorts of reasons. It may be that they’re tired from their day and are acting out because of fatigue, or it could be that they just think it’s fun to press your buttons and test those limits. Toddlers are famous for acting out because they’re learning about cause and effect, or in other words, If I do this, how will my parents react?

But one of the most common reasons that kids misbehave is because they’re anxious, dysregulated, or trying to distract from the expectations being placed on them. It feels easier to do something naughty or distracting, shifting your focus onto their behavior rather than on what food they may not be eating.

Feeling pressured to eat a new food is stressful! It can be almost impossible to take that pressure off our kids, as many of them put it on themselves, and as loving parents, we worry so much about if our children are getting enough to eat. That worry and love creates a cycle of expectation and pressure on our kids. Understanding why your child is acting out can help you approach the behavior from a place of compassion, which is key to your success. If you get angry or frustrated, the situation will escalate and get worse, but if you can stay calm and compassionate, you’ll be better prepared to diffuse the situation and end their negative behaviors.

In this chapter, I’ll go through some of the most common misbehaviors that I see and some ways to combat them. With all the strategies I share, remember that it can take two to four weeks to see an effect, so don’t give up if it doesn’t work the very first time. It’s important to stay consistent once you choose a strategy to try.

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