Peaches and Schemes (A Georgia B&B Mystery) by Anna Gerard

Author:Anna Gerard [Gerard, Anna]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781643855844
Publisher: CROOKED LANE BOOKS
Published: 2021-05-11T05:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eleven

“Engaged?” I squeaked in a voice high enough that it should have brought Mattie running. “As in, the two of you are getting married?”

“That’s usually how it goes,” Harry replied. “Fortunately, as her new fiancé is some washed-up ballplayer named Harold Anderson, I’m pretty sure the wedding will never happen.”

Now it was my turn to hold my head in my hands. In the short time I’d known the man, I’d seen him accused of murder, threatened by a knife-wielding stalker, and even cast in a rewritten version of Hamlet to help catch a murderer. But impulsive marriage proposals were a whole other level of bizarre, even for him.

Well, except for his original lapse into matrimony back when he was eighteen.

I sunk onto the sofa opposite him and asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Harry shrugged. “There’s not much to tell. I played my role as doting boyfriend to perfection, and I found sufficient non-meat products on the buffet to make a tolerable meal. Best of all, none of the family knew anything about baseball, but all of them were thrilled to meet a former professional athlete. Bottom line, the reunion went swimmingly for the first hour or so.”

“Until…?” I prompted.

“Until the slew of family good news.” He raised a hand and started ticking off fingers. “First, cousin Bobby and his wife Glenda announced they were expecting baby number three. Then sister Jen and husband Phil started showing pictures of the new mansion they’d just bought in Savannah. Uncle Lester had to brag about his son Pembroke’s making partner at some law firm in Atlanta. Oh, Meredith’s father and her Aunt Miranda got into dueling photos of their respective Galapagos Islands vacations last spring.”

“Sounds pretty grim,” I agreed, feeling a little sorry for the good doctor having to compete against a family of one-uppers. “I guess having a new boyfriend”—I gave the word finger quotes—“wasn’t enough to win her the ‘Best in Family’ competition.”

“Exactly. I suggested she try a brag or two about her daughter, but apparently Buddy’s accomplishments can’t trump giant tortoises and law partnerships. No, she needed something that would put the spotlight solely on her. So she offered me a nice bonus if I would propose to her during the family’s annual croquet tournament.”

I gave him a hard look. “Really, Harry, you’d stoop to fake-asking a woman to marry her for cash? I thought the whole escort thing was kind of smarmy already, but this bogus engagement is really beyond the pale, even for you.”

“For your information, the only stooping was when I got down on one knee in the center of the croquet court,” he loftily replied, brushing imaginary grass from his trouser leg. “Don’t worry, I gave Meredith her money’s worth when I pledged my undying love.”

While I waited expectantly, he continued, “I stole the paper ring off Uncle Lester’s cigar and used that instead of a diamond. The proposal was a mash-up of Romeo and Juliet meets The Wedding Singer meets Little Women—the Winona Ryder version, of course.

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