Left for Dead by Ebony Canion

Author:Ebony Canion
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Motivational & Inspirational, Adventurers & Explorers, Personal Memoirs, Self-Help, Biography & Autobiography, Cultural Heritage, Women
ISBN: 9781934230596
Publisher: Life Changing Books
Published: 2014-01-14T05:00:00+00:00

MOVING ON

There are many things that fuel an abusive relationship. In my case, my love for Shawn, and hope for our future, convinced me to accept his abusive behavior. I always wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, and I believed that he really would change. I had the utmost faith in him. I really, really believed that each slap, punch, or all out beating would be the last. I definitely thought that was the case when he finally admitted to having a problem, and promised me he would stop.

My thoughts couldn’t have been more wrong.

Despite his promises, the beatings started up again. After one particular beating that left me with yet another black eye, I also caught him cheating on me. I was devastated. Then, I became frustrated. I thought about how I’d walked around with black eyes, while constantly lying to my friends, all in an attempt to keep up the act. I wanted people to think I had a good man, when in reality, he wasn’t just beating me; he was also cheating on me.

The mental and physical abuse had to end.

I’d had enough that night. I decided to be the one to do the snapping.

Shawn walked in around two a.m., acting as if cheating on me wasn’t a big deal. When I questioned him, he said he didn’t want to talk about it. I wasn’t having it though. I was pissed. So when he went to sleep, I grabbed the iron, headed into the bedroom, and hit him with it, knowing what the consequences would be. I didn’t care. I was angry and I wanted to fight, win or lose.

Strangely, I had begun to exhibit the very abuse that I was enduring. Would that really solve the cheating issue? No, it wouldn’t, but I decided to listen to the devil on my shoulder.

As expected, Shawn jumped out of the bed, grabbed me, and started beating me. This time though, unlike the others, I fought back hard. I kicked, punched, scratched, and did whatever else I could to gain some sort of advantage. I was trying to do extreme damage. I wanted him to suffer and feel the pain he’d so often inflicted on me. Ironically, Shawn fought me just as hard. He slung me around like a rag doll; all over the room, and against walls so hard that the entire house shook with each impact.

It was an absolute battle.

During past incidents, I’d only tried to fight back. This time, I was fighting back for real. I tried my hardest to lay on him everything he’d painfully inflicted on me. Plus, I was fighting out of the frustration, anger, hurt, and betrayal brought on by his abuse. It was all just culminating inside me and needed to be unleashed. As I swung, I could see each moment he’d hit me playing inside my mind. I remembered every time he’d hurt me. Those visions drove every punch I threw. But despite how hard I fought, Shawn was stronger.

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