How to Get a Date with the Evil Queen by Marie Cardno

How to Get a Date with the Evil Queen by Marie Cardno

Author:Marie Cardno [Marie Cardno]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Marie Cardno
Published: 2023-07-19T00:00:00+00:00


Black softened into shadows, into the red glow of light behind closed eyelids, and juddered sickeningly into the haphazard blur of reality. She was a lump of pain with a central nervous system that had gone into catastrophic meltdown. She was … ouch.

Nearby, a man was talking, his voice low and hurting.

“Don’t joke. You joked about dragons last time, and guess what showed up here?” He paused, and Sian just made out the tinny shape of words on the other end of a phone line. Whoever he was talking to exclaimed in shock, or outrage – she wasn’t sure which. “It’s like it’s listening to us. Not a natural phenomenon like we thought. It’s – it’s paying attention. Changing.”

Another pause, and he added: “It’s a person now. No. Don’t – it hasn’t latched on to me. Don’t come. Christ. The magic hasn’t given up on our happy-ever-after yet, but it hasn’t come to that.” Another listening pause. “There’s a woman here who’s friends with the woman who got … transformed. She’s a prince.”

Whoever he was talking to swore like someone Sian wanted to be friends with.

“I know. Ros had some ideas, but…” He sighed. “Just when you think things couldn’t be worse, right?”

This was getting awkward. Sian flung out one hand. It hit something that thudded to the ground, and in the time it took her to convince her eyes to open, he was in front of her.

The guy from the beach. The dragon-slayer.

She nodded to him. “Hey.”

“You’re up? She’s up,” he told the phone. Sian stared at the coiled wire connecting it to the machine on the wall. What decade was this world in? “I’d better go. Don’t worry. I’ll leave the saving the world to her. I’m just here to sulk and look pretty, remember?”

The other person said something that sounded like, “And don’t you forget it.”

Victor smiled. “Miss you,” he said, so quietly Sian almost missed it. A pause while the other person replied, then, “You too.”

Sian tried to speak. Cleared her throat. Tried again. “Where am I?”

Victor stared at the silent receiver for a moment, then sighed and hung it back on the hook. “Don’t worry. I brought you back to my flat.”

Why? she wondered, on top of everything else she was wondering. “Who was that?”

“Someone I care about.” He hesitated, sighed, and added, “Tash. She’s my princess.”

“Oh. Congrats?”

“Not really.”

His words didn’t make sense, but not much did, so. Everything was all … woozy. The sort of woozy that was the equivalent of someone saying, Oh no, don’t look over there, everything’s fine but don’t look, except the over there they were trying to keep her attention away from was everything from her neck down. She didn’t need to look. She could already feel it, and it felt like someone was taking a cheese grater to her bones.

She tried another question. “Back to your flat?”

“You’re welcome. And – I’m sorry. About what happened down the bay.” His face twisted. “You needed our help and I ignored you.



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