Girl A: The truth about the Rochdale sex ring by the victim who stopped them by Ebury Digital

Author:Ebury Digital
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9781448175024
Publisher: Ebury Publishing
Published: 2013-10-10T00:00:00+00:00

Something nice: Hanging around with mates

Something horrible: School

My mates: Robyn

How do I spend my time: Drinking and going out

Where do I go: Friends’ houses

What do I do: Party

What do I want to do in the future: Be rich

What risks have I taken: Loads

After that, she wanted me to make a list under two headings: ‘Good things about being a girl’ and ‘Bad things about being a girl’.

In the first column I wrote down the usual suspects: Boys, make-up, getting hair done and shopping.

In the second I wrote:

Losing your virginity, periods, having a baby, responsibility, being used, being in love, vulnerability.

I thought we were finished, but then she asked me to do one more of the things she did with kids like me. ‘Perfect Partners’, she called it, and I had to describe the sort of lad I dreamed about.

Looking back, I think she was trying to make me think about Jake (she still didn’t know he hadn’t been a real, proper boyfriend). She said she wanted it to be all about respect: how you’d look at the qualities a lad had to offer and aim for someone with good ones, because that would make you feel good about yourself and good about life.

So I thought about that. And I realised that while I was being ravaged by the men, and flipped this way and that way – treated as though I might have been one of those naked, plastic models they have in department-store windows – Jake had come on to me and he had used me too.

And, finally, I tried desperately hard to imagine that I was leading a normal life and could actually choose someone to be my partner – someone to love and to look after me; someone to value and respect me.

All of that was beyond me for ever, I thought. I could feel Jane studying me as I scribbled my list of ‘Perfect Partner’ words for her, but she had only an inkling of why I was wiping away tears.

I’d written:

Caring

Nice body

Honest

Fit

Nice

Money

Drinks

Car

Funny

Trustworthy

Good looking

Kind

Job

Romantic

‘Well done, Hannah,’ she said. ‘It looks a lovely list.’

A week later, on 28 November, Jane was back in school, and this time she asked me the question I’d been pushing to the back of my mind – it filled me with dread and fear.

Would I talk to the police again? she asked. Would I tell them what the gang had been doing to me since the days with Daddy?

‘No way,’ I said. ‘I only told you because I’m not involved any more. And it’s confidential.’

Inside, I was shuddering, and wondering how the hell she could even ask such a question – even though I was bluffing, and was actually still caught up by the gang.

I’d reported it all to the police nearly four months earlier, and what had happened? Nothing. Who was Jane to be suggesting that I talk to them again now?

‘No,’ I said again.

Jane realised she’d crossed a line with me that I wasn’t about to go over, and held up her hands as if to say, ‘I surrender.

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