Exposed at the Back by Arild Stavrum

Author:Arild Stavrum [Stavrum, Arild]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Norway
Publisher: Freight Books
Published: 2014-09-07T14:00:00+00:00

“Posh” and “Becks”

First came the pink graphics, then two arrows flew by with Per and Sabrina’s names embroidered on ribbons trailing below. From the opposite side came a heart-shaped football. The arrows hit the ball, penetrating it, and they all flew down towards Ullevaal Stadion. In the centre circle was an animated version of the young couple kissing in front of a capacity crowd. One by one, the letters appeared on the green grass: PDTV.

When life became complicated, Benedikte thought, there was only one thing to do: watch reality TV. She’d tried many times to justify her love for the genre. Call it mental pornography, escapism or whatever else, the truth was that Benedikte loved it. They worse they got, the programmes only seemed to get more enjoyable. Her current favourite was MTV’s A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, in which the bisexual presenter was chatted up by both men and women.

PDTV hadn’t yet qualified for a podium spot in reality TV heaven, but there had been some priceless scenes, such as when Marius Bjartmann and his wife came round for dinner. Watching Bjartmann eating sushi with chopsticks was unforgettable. It looked like the centre-back was wearing windproof mittens. The item had been so popular that the producers were considering introducing a regular dinner feature. Norwegians couldn’t get enough of watching famous people eat.

Football used to be shy and maybe even a little boring. That was until David Beckham married Posh Spice. Soon we would hear that Becks had taken a boot on the head from a hot-tempered Alex Ferguson, that Zlatan got into fights with numerous teammates, and that most coaches thought they were Al Pacino in Any Given Sunday, all stories that once would’ve stayed in the changing rooms. In any case, a reality TV series about a Norwegian footballer’s life wouldn’t have happened before David met Victoria.

The fact that Beckham had gone on playing well while he became a public figure made it easier for Vålerenga to accept their highest-profile player marketing himself like this. Vålerenga had also had the opportunity for various product placements that they, in turn, had sold on to their sponsors. At the same time, they coached everyone from their own management on the importance of describing PDTV as ‘good PR’.

Vålerenga had grown to become top of the class in financial terms, having once done their accounts on hot-dog wrappers. The club’s great financial sobriety meant its accounts for the previous year had only marginally gone tens of millions of kroner into the red, and now they’d set themselves the unenviable target of actually balancing the books. They couldn’t let any potential revenue sources slip away. The club knew that, if they managed to balance the books and have a Norwegian football club making money, they would be responsible for the greatest revolution in football since the invention of the goal.

But the rights to the concept, and to the big money, belonged to Golden Boys and the newspaper VG, whose website hosted the series, and they were already talking about expanding the idea to other top Norwegian players.

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