Evil Men by T.J. Land

Author:T.J. Land [Land, T.J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-11-09T16:00:00+00:00

***

“Get up, loser.”

Lying facedown on his absurdly luxurious bed, Cassius said, “Vrinda, if you’ve come to beat me up for taking your sister along, I would like to point out, in my defence, that she is hard to argue with. Also, I’m not much good at making people do anything they don’t want to do. I’m not – I’m not a cleverclogs, I’m not a silver-tongued mastermind, for fuck’s sake. I’m a burglar who likes books. That’s all. It’s not reasonable to expect me to go up against a career politician and win the first round.”

“What the hell are you talking about? Get up. We’re going drinking.”

Cassius rolled over and squinted at her. “Drinking.”

“It’s Tuesday,” she said, as though that explained everything and he was a moron for needing the reminder. “Whenever we’re in town and it’s Tuesday, we go drinking. John Claw buys the first round. Whoever’s fucked up the most lately buys the second. We discussed it and we agreed that no one around here’s fucked up as much as you have, so you’re it.”

“Go away.”

“Pfft. Come on. Would you rather spend the evening hanging around this creepy old place getting stalked by the pink-haired bitch and side-eyed by the staff?”

Vrinda, it turned out, was also hard to argue with.

The tavern they dragged him to presented nothing much to complain about – the beer was good, the room warm, the mice timid – which was a shame, because Cassius was in the mood to complain robustly.

“That twat’s gonna get his lute shoved up his ass sideways if he doesn’t choose a better damned song,” he bellyached, glaring at the blind musician seated in the corner, a jar at his feet slowly collecting coins.

Vrinda pinched his ear. “That’s ‘The Stars Go On Forever’, you gormless hick. Traditional Kolkatan love ballad. It’s beautiful.”

“I don’t like foreign music.”

“Oof. Yikes. Must be tough. What’s the alternative? Hymns? Or those dismal folk songs about wheat, and harvesting wheat, and fucking in wheat, and fucking magical women who can turn into wheat, and what to do when the wheat’s on fire? That’s no way to live, Cassius.”

“I don’t like any music. I don’t like anything. Leave me alone.”

“Good Lord. Proper ray of sunshine when things don’t go your way, aren’t you?”

Playing cards at the table behind them with Veda, Brutus said, “What crawled up your arse and died, shorty? Seems to me the world’s your oyster now. Got the ear of the most powerful woman in Brenning. Got a dragon on your side. I’d love to have your problems.”

“Now, now, Brutus,” chided John Claw, bringing over a plate of sausages and steaming potatoes. He was walking quickly this evening, with his cane hung over his elbow. “Never assume you understand the private struggles of others. Perhaps Cassius and his dragon have had a falling out.”

“We haven’t,” Cassius snapped. “We’re just… he’s not listening to me.”

“Why should he?” asked Vrinda, biting a sausage in two. “Seriously. What makes you so qualified to educate an ancient

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