Capsized by Bridget E. Baker

Author:Bridget E. Baker [Baker, Bridget E.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Purple Puppy Publishing

15

Earth

If Ra’s right and I woke up because I'm not quite ready to know the answers I asked about, then I hate my brain. Why in the world would I wake up right then? I need those answers. I close my eyes in the near dark and will myself to go back to sleep. I mean, seriously? I finally recover some of my old memories, but the memory ends before the most important moment?

Well. Maybe not the most important moment.

My lips feel swollen from those kisses with Alexander, and they were only a memory.

But I did need that information.

Ra looked guilty. No, more than that, he looked downright troubled when I asked him whether he had cast a spell to make me who I am. That's not very promising. Neither is the concept that my brain is shielding me from a truth I already know but can't accept. What awful thing might he have done? What kind of spell must he have used?

Am I the monster I feared I was? Am I so terrible, so ghastly, that my own mother felt compelled to leave me?

I think about Kahn, of his beauty and grace. I think about my memories of Alexander and the things he could do. Nothing about him repulsed me. Nothing about him made me shudder. And Ra confessed that he altered Kahn, er, Alexander, but I don’t find him monstrous. Why, then, does the prospect of the same thing done to me leave me at once angry and scared?

This is all so confusing.

But I can't imagine Ra, his eyes full of sorrow when he discussed the children he had to kill, gambling with my safety. No, whatever he hasn't yet told me, it can't be that bad.

Right?

I finally give in and kick the blankets off. I'm not going back to sleep. Whatever information Ra may have been about to confess or deny, I'm not going to find out by reliving that moment.

Which means I may as well get going for the day. I'm more relieved than ever that Ra is back, and he can handle all the preparations for Isis' army, but I'm still worried. She controls more governments than I want to consider, and she's channeling the power of the majority of the women who are alive. I can't even think about what she might do with that. As much as I'd like to let Ra just handle everything, I know he's going to need my help.

I was hoping to remember exactly how Terra was made so that I could comprehend what went into the spell in the first place, but even without that memory, I should be helping. Usually when I wake up, there are people hovering outside waiting to clean or bring me food. It's kind of annoying, but I didn't realize how much I've relied upon the frenetic energy of the palace.

With no other duties or tasks pressing on me, I shower and get myself ready for the day. That’s when I realize that

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