5 The Boy Who Never Grew Up by David Handler

Author:David Handler [Handler, David]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781453260241
Publisher: MysteriousPress.com/Open Road
Published: 2012-06-26T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 10

THE OLD SURF BUM CALLED IT. MORNING dawned foggy and blessedly cool. I threw open my windows and let in the damp air. It smelled of the ocean and the charred remains of Homewood. Most of the front page of the Times was given over to a photo of the blaze, which authorities were labeling as man-made in origin. Sheldon Selden, president of Bedford Falls, stated: “A piece of movie history has been destroyed. But Homewood will live on. We will rebuild as soon as humanly possible.” Mr. Selden said it was too soon to estimate the cost of the damage. He also said he had no idea why anyone would want to do such a thing.

Matthew Wax could not be reached for comment.

No new developments were reported in the police investigation of the Hazen Drive shootings.

I awoke paying for the sin of mixing champagne with high-octane bug killer. My head had a Spalding Top-Flite II caroming around inside of it. A pot of coffee and three extra-strength Excedrins managed to lodge it snugly behind my right eye but, as Robert Benchley once wrote, the only real cure for a hangover is death. I pulled on my old sweatshirt of gray cashmere and my mukluks and spent the morning at my Olympia. I worked my way through Matthew’s crush on Mona Schaffer, his brief, humiliating fling with high school hoops, his discovery of the Panorama back lot. The work went smoothly. But I wasn’t pleased. Gloomy was more like it. Part of it was all of this murder and mayhem I’d gotten myself into. I wanted it to make sense. It didn’t. Part of it was Merilee. I wanted her to call. She hadn’t. Part of it was Pennyroyal. I wanted to kiss her again. I couldn’t. And part of it I couldn’t put my finger on. Whatever it was, Lulu was feeling it, too. She was sulky and restless all morning. I think she’d had it with Hollywood. I think she wanted to go home. I think I did, too.

It was Saturday, and the lot was quiet. I strolled over to Stage One by way of Homewood. Lulu stayed behind in the bungalow. She wanted to be alone. She gets that way sometimes. From being around me, I imagine. Insurance and fire department investigators were sifting through the ashes. Sheldon Selden stood there with them, chubby hands on his chubby hips. A few studio employees had stopped by on their day off for a glimpse at movie history. One of them, an elderly woman, was taking pictures. When Shelley noticed this he wigged out.

“What the fuck do you think this is?!” he screamed at her, veins popping from his neck. “A fucking amusement park?!” He stormed over to the frightened woman, snatched the camera from her and hurled it to the ground. Then he stomped on it until he’d destroyed it. Only then did he calm down. And become aware that everyone was watching him in horror. “Jesus,” he gasped, his chest heaving.

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