Your Body, Your Best Friend by Erica Mather

Author:Erica Mather
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: body image;body positivity;beauty standards;fatphobia;divine feminine;eff your beauty standards;The Body is Not an Apology;Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls;feminism;health at any size;body shaming;body confidence;adore your body;body image breakthrough;self-confidence;self-criticism;goddess worship;forest yoga;inner goddess;warrior goddess training
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2020-03-16T17:58:09+00:00

We all seem to think that we have plenty of time; we think that we have more time than we do. Our bodies will die, and our lives are a treasure—we should make the most of them, every day!

Kelley noticed that having urgency about living can create its own set of problems on down days. On days that she feels tired and wants to give her body a rest, another voice speaks up: “Don’t waste even one more day; get up!” Some of this was also fueled by the loss of two friends to cancer, and survivor’s guilt. She mused out loud, “How come I got to live, while they died?”

During her illness, Kelley used her skillful body relationship that she had cultivated through decades of yoga practice. She continued to practice yoga as she was able. Sometimes stretching her fingers was her yoga practice. She found support and help adjusting to the new reality of “being flat” through online communities. She made the decision to let her breasts go with the complete support of her husband, who also, of course, mourned their departure. Men bond with our breasts! It’s impossible to say that her relationship with her body ensured her survival, but I believe that her skillfulness in working with it, forgiving it, feeling compassion for it went far in helping her to ease her own pain, sadness, fear, and disappointment throughout the experience. In the end, her deep internal work, viewing her body as a sacred vessel for her spirit, created the possibility for her to, in her own words, sur-thrive!

In addition to these supportive steps, Kelley also volunteers once a year in Eleuthera, in the Bahamas, teaching yoga to women who have had mastectomies. This is one of the greatest self-help techniques when our spin doctor gets out of control and tells us everything is baaaaaad—to be helpful to others. It gets us out of our heads and helps us to see the world from a different perspective.

When you’re having a down day—it doesn’t need to be about an illness, necessarily, it could just be about life—look for ways to get out of your own head. Call a friend, or do something helpful for another person, or just show a kindness to anyone around you. These small acts help us shift our perceptions and also our feelings.

Your health depends most on what you do every day.

One reason I believe that a good body relationship is imperative is because it will better prepare us for the inevitability of an illness. When we confront an illness—especially one that threatens our survival—we come face to face with who we really are and the value of our own lives. Are we good to our bodies, and are we living our best lives? These become priority questions. Start to take stock of this in small ways and get out ahead of these questions. Don’t wait for a tragedy! Are you good to your body? When you have a cold, perhaps you just push through and go to work.

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