Wide Open by D. M. Ditson

Author:D. M. Ditson
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: abuse; intimate partner violenc; fundamentalism; evangelical; patriarchy; sexual assault; post-traumatic stress disorder; me too; meditation; healing; forgiveness; self compassion; memoir
ISBN: 9781550509687
Publisher: Coteau Books

Next time I show her a charcoal drawing. It’s black and white, just a trunk and a hundred naked branches whipping in the wind.

“Is this you?” Leah asks.

“No. It’s a tree.” Obviously.

“But does it represent you? Sometimes people draw themselves into their pictures.”

I go to my room and stare at my wall of dead trees, black scribbles and the browning acrylic tulip that droops to the ground under the weight of its bulb.

Leah’s right. They are all me.

Together

18

The Shape of my Teeth

Now

Ian bounds up the sidewalk carrying a pot of purple flowers. I open the door for him and he passes me the pot. A note is sticking up above the petals. Not a note, a cheque. For a grand.

“It’s a loan so you can pay the mortgage off right now,” Ian says.

He knows I’ve been obsessing about the mortgage. I only have one more payment until it will be gone, until the house will be mine instead of the bank’s.

“I’m proud of how hard you’ve worked to pay off your house,” he says.

“Our house,” I say, mashing myself into his arms.

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