When a Pagan Prays by Nimue Brown

Author:Nimue Brown [Brown, Nimue]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-78279-632-9
Publisher: John Hunt Publishing
Published: 2014-06-25T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Ten

Attitudes to Prayer

There is a flow of influence between where we go to in order to pray, how we utilise our bodies once there, and the emotions and expectations we bring to prayer. If these harmonise, we will have a much better experience than if we feel conflict. For example, if we are obliged to pray somewhere we don’t much like, if our bodies provide obstacles, or ambivalence of belief gets in the way, there will be no glorious outcome. This is fine, and if you run into such issues, it is simply an invitation to take a deeper look. Most things in life require practice and some fine tuning to discover what suits us best. If prayer does not work in the way you want it to, then assess your physical arrangements and feelings to work out what needs to change. Then make those changes, or at least work towards them.

Being on a spiritual path changes a person, and being changed is very much part of the point in any of this work. What I needed from Druidry ten years ago has very little in common with what I find I need today. Life changes us. Druidry changes life, and what was valuable before can become meaningless. When we first come to prayer, and to a wider spiritual tradition, we most likely come along wanting something: peace, enlightenment, importance, hope…There are many things to want.

Blessed Kami, I just want someone to love me…hail spirits of place, let me be The Druid of this sacred grove…Dear Gods, make it stop hurting…

We are human, driven by wants and needs that come from our experience of life. This is what we bring to prayer. There is no shame in this. You can only show up with what you have. If you were peace-laden and enlightened already, there would be no need to show up and no further work to do.

We pray out of our needs and wants. This is a process which begins from wherever you are, regardless of where that is in relation to anyone else. I do not think there is much point fretting over where you imagine you are “supposed” to be. Many mainstream religions advocate turning up with a specific attitude. Submission to god, a worshipful approach, an open heart, a sense of gratitude, or a feeling of humbleness, are all recommended. There is a definite sense that turning up in the petulant child mind-set of I want a pony is not acceptable. However, this may well be where we start.

I came to prayer in a state of pain and fear. I was ill of body and mind as a direct consequence of experiences both historical and on-going. My trust was impaired…and dammit gods, I could use some help sorting this out. Had I started out more able to believe in both prayer and deity, I would have petitioned with those needs and wants, probably to the exclusion of all else. As I didn’t see much point in petition, those for pity’s sake, make this stop prayers came only in extremity.

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