The Pigman & Me by Paul Zindel

Author:Paul Zindel [Zindel, Paul]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Graymalkin Media
Published: 2011-07-11T22:00:00+00:00

Anyway, the Sunday before I was to start school, Nonno Frankie saw me stumbling around in our half of the backyard in a frightened stupor. He called me over to him.

“You start school tomorrow?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“You don’t look happy about it.”

“I’m not.”

“You don’t do good in school?”

“I got good marks in all the other schools I went to.”

“You get along with teachers?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Nonno Frankie smiled. “School should be a happy place. It should be like a big bubbling pot of juicy meatballs! You should eat it all up and join the CP Club.”

“What’s the CP Club?”

“The Clean Plate Club. You must gobble up school.”

“What if it tries to gobble me up?”

“You don’t let it. You learn the important rules, and then nothing and nobody can hurt you,” Nonno Frankie said, giving me one of his winks. “You will meet pretty girls at school.”

“Maybe they won’t be so pretty.”

“When I went to school in Italy, a girl could have a face like a train wreck as long as she was blond. Ho! Ho! Ho!”

I laughed weakly. “Jennifer told me there are some nasty kids at this school.”

Nonno Frankie smiled sympathetically. “You’ll read, learn, and get smart!”

My mouth had gone dry. “I want all the kids to like me,” I finally managed to say.

Nonno Frankie looked at me seriously. “Only dead fish swim with the stream. You just worry about liking yourself, that’s what you should worry about!” He put his hand on my shoulder, and we stood at the edge of his tomato patch. “See! All the tomatoes have been picked. They all grew up and have gone into our stomachs! That’s the rule of tomatoes! Tomatoes have rules, and I’ll tell you all the rules you need to know for school. Have all the experiences you can. Experience is wonderful! It teaches you how to recognize all your mistakes when you make them over and over again! Do you mind me giving you advice?”

“No,” I said. “I need all the advice I can get!”

It seemed strange Nonno Frankie was the one taking the time to care about what I was feeling. I remember thinking that maybe this is what fathers are supposed to do. Maybe this is why fathers exist. Good fathers, not absentee fathers or spirited wacked-out mothers.

“Don’t be discouraged by fat books,” Nonno Frankie warned me. “In every fat book, there’s a little thin book trying to get out! And don’t put grease on your hair the night before you’re going to have a big test.”

“Why not?”

“Everything might slip your mind! Ho! Ho! Ho! Get it?”

“Yes, Nonno Frankie.”

“I’ll teach you every rule I know about going to school. When in doubt, a closed mouth gathers no feet! And never get into rock fights with kids who have ugly faces, because they have nothing to lose! And never, never play leapfrog with a unicorn!”

Now that little thought made me smile.

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