The Complete AAA Ace Interplanetary Decontamination Service by Robert Sheckley

Author:Robert Sheckley
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Published: 2016-03-29T04:00:00+00:00

—ROBERT SHECKLEY

The Lifeboat Mutiny

No, sir, they do not build boats like this any longer...and this is the reason!

“TELL me the truth. Did you ever see sweeter engines?” Joe, the Interstellar Junkman asked. “And look at those servos!”

“Hmm,” Gregor said judiciously.

“That hull,” Joe said softly. “I bet it’s five hundred years old, and not a spot of corrosion on it.” He patted the burnished side of the boat affectionately. What luck, the pat seemed to say, that this paragon among vessels should be here just when AAA Ace needs a lifeboat.

“She certainly does seem rather nice,” Arnold said, with the studied air of a man who has fallen in love and is trying hard not to show it. “What do you think, Dick?”

Richard Gregor didn’t answer. The boat was handsome, and she looked perfect for ocean survey work on Trident. But you had to be careful about Joe’s merchandise.

“They just don’t build ’em this way any more,” Joe sighed. “Look at the propulsion unit. Couldn’t dent it with a trip-hammer. Note the capacity of the cooling system. Examine—”

“It looks good,” Gregor said slowly. The AAA Ace Interplanetary Decontamination Service had dealt with Joe in the past, and had learned caution. Not that Joe was dishonest; far from it. The flotsam he collected from anywhere in the inhabited Universe worked. But the ancient machines often had their own ideas of how a job should be done. They tended to grow peevish when forced into another routine.

“I don’t care if it’s beautiful, fast, durable, or even comfortable,” Gregor said defiantly. “I just want to be absolutely sure it’s safe.”

Joe nodded. “That’s the important thing, of course. Step inside.”

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