The Bearer by M.H. Lee

Author:M.H. Lee [Lee, M.H.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: M.H. Lee

Almost two weeks pass before I see him again.

Nurse Helen wheels me into the room and helps me onto the cold slab of metal. It's early spring but I'm wearing a thick wrap to keep away the cold. The shakes in my legs are so bad that I can't walk more than a few feet at a time.

My aunt never told me it would be like this.

He trails along behind the Mother and Doctor Benford, hanging back, his hands moving restlessly as he crosses and uncrosses his arms.

When he sees me lying there, shivering against the cold, he surges towards me before stopping himself with a furtive glance at his wife.

I know I should look away. I'm just an object, a thing to them. The only reason I'm there is because the baby can't be there without me.

But I can't.

The sight of him steadies me.

A small tear falls down my cheek. I ignore it, too scared to wipe it away as the Mother and doctor approach.

"We'd like to wean her off the fenurine."

"Why? Every study I've read says that fenurine, if used during pregnancy, gives babies advanced motor skills."

"I understand that, but the effect it's having on the Bearer …"

"I don't care about the Bearer. I care about the baby. Is it having an effect on the baby?"

I turn my head towards the wall, not wanting to listen. Not wanting to hear more.

A hand strokes my hair and I smell the crisp scent of soap. I know without looking that it's him. Who else would it be?

I close my eyes and cling to the sensation of his fingers in my hair while the women poke and prod me.

They continue to discuss the fenurine, the doctor unable to articulate a reason to stop it, the Mother adamant that it continue.

All I care about is him. Nothing else matters in that moment.

I'm not sure how long it lasts, but they finally leave me alone, curled on the cold metal table, to wait for Nurse Helen.

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