The Arrangement: Collection D (Vol 10-12) by Ward H.M

Author:Ward, H.M.
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-63035-194-6
Publisher: Laree Bailey Press
Published: 2019-03-11T16:00:00+00:00

19

I’m not normal anymore. At one time I might have been mainstream, but not now. There are too many nightmares that walk about in daylight, and Black just pinpointed my worst fear. I barely survived my parents’ deaths. I couldn’t make it through Sean’s, and yet, everyone must die. It’s a matter of when and how much time we have left. I don’t suppose other people think about death the way I do. Sometimes I imagine the worst thing possible, trying to brace myself for it, so I never feel so off balance again.

The day my parents died was unexpected. There was nothing to brace me, no one to hold me up. At times like that a person finds out how strong they are, and I’ve started to think that I am not weak. I endured it and I can still smile. I lived through tragedy and still breathe. I got to tomorrow and things looked brighter, but Black saying that—suggesting that one day I’ll be alone again—cut me to the core. She found my weakness.

We leave the building without another word. Gabe has the limo waiting out front, so Mel and I slip inside and get out of the chilly night air. Sighing, I lean my head back against the seat as Gabe drives us in silence.

Mel finally speaks, “Don’t let her get inside your head. That’s what she was trying to do, Avery. Shove her out.”

I wish it were that simple, but Black’s words planted a seed in my mind. The thought is already growing, vining around inside my head like a rampant weed. I don’t want it there, but she spoke the truth. The thought of losing Sean terrifies me. I can’t go back to that life where I was barely glued together. I’m not strong enough to live through it again. “I know, but she knew what she was doing and honed in on something that scares me more than anything. The stupid thing is that I had no idea it was there. I mean, I always said my biggest fear was being trapped inside a closet or something. She blindsided me, that’s all, and it would have been easier to blow her off if it wasn’t the truth.”

“People weave the truth into lies all the time, Avery. It’s the best way to bring someone down, and that’s what Black’s trying to do to you.” Mel glances up at Gabe. Her eyes shift away from him, like maybe she shouldn’t be saying these things in front of him.

“Gabe won’t repeat anything. Say whatever you’re thinking.” I slouch back in the seat, trying to keep my butt from peeking out from under my way-too-short dress.

Gabe glances back at us and nods once. “I don’t hear nothin’.” He stares ahead at the traffic.

“First of all, I feel guilty. I had no idea things were going to turn out like this. I’m sorry, Avery. I really am. And no matter what she says, no matter what she tells you, don’t wade deeper into this shit than you already are.

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