Sex 101 by Clifford Penner

Author:Clifford Penner
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook, book
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Published: 2010-11-05T16:00:00+00:00

The Man’s Preparation

Just as the woman should make certain her body is healthy, free from infection, and ready for sexual intercourse, so should the man. It is wise to have a complete physical examination by a medical doctor. If you have any concerns related to your genitals, these can be dealt with at the time of your examination. The privacy of the physician’s office is the place to address any questions. If your concerns or questions are minimized by the physician, that is a sign of the physician’s inadequacy, not that you asked an inappropriate question. Find another doctor. When you get your blood tested for your marriage license requirements, get tested for AIDS, genital warts, herpes simplex II, and any other sexually transmitted diseases that might be of concern. Testing for sexually transmitted diseases is a gift of trust you give each other. That is true whether or not you have been sexually active previously.

Whatever your practice of masturbation or your past sexual experience has been, you would do yourself and your new wife a big favor if you practiced, through self-stimulation, learning to extend ejaculation. It is important that no self-stimulation be practiced in association with pornography or other addictions.

You can learn ejaculatory control by focusing on and savoring the pleasurable sensations, becoming aware of the warning signs that you are nearing ejaculation, stopping and starting stimulation, and/or squeezing the coronal ridge of the penis. Stimulation must be stopped or the squeeze applied long before you notice you are approaching the point of no return when you are about to ejaculate. Another important ingredient to learning to delay ejaculation is to rest or allow the intensity of the arousal to dissipate while you stop stimulation or apply the squeeze. Then resume stimulation. For more information refer to chapter 16 in our book Restoring the Pleasure, Helen Singer Kaplan’s book P.E.: How to Overcome Premature Ejaculation,3 or Michael E. Metz and Barry McCarthy’s book Coping with Premature Ejaculation: How to Overcome PE, Please Your Partner, & Have Great Sex.4

Stimulating yourself to ejaculation within twenty-four hours before your wedding night will also be of great benefit to both you and your bride because you will likely be more excited and fatigued than usual and more apt to ejaculate quickly. This can be disappointing to both of you. A recent ejaculation will increase the time of pleasure and enjoyment for this first, memorable, married sexual experience.

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