Raveling: A Novel by Peter Moore Smith

Author:Peter Moore Smith [Smith, Peter Moore]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
ISBN: 9780759525993
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company
Published: 2001-09-30T00:00:00+00:00

They stood together on the beach again, and this time it was night, and the clouds billowing up in the sky made the horizon turn black, and the last filtered light of the descending sun misted over the countryside behind them. “I was a terrible brother,” Eric was saying. “I wish I could have—”

“Eric.” Katherine put a hand on his chest. The water was gentle right now, for some reason, the tide low.

“I want to make it up to him.” My brother turned his face away dramatically. “I want to, to find a way to feel better,” he said, “some redemption. The things I used to say to him.” He closed his eyes.

With his eyes closed, she thought, he looked like a statue. “Eric,” Katherine said. “Magical thinking. You’re smarter than this. You’re a brain surgeon, for Christ’s—”

“I was really bad,” he said. “Abusive, there’s no other word for it.”

“Do you have any idea how cruel my sister and I were to each other?”

“Really?”

“Terrible. Evil.”

“Is that why you don’t speak with her anymore?”

She looked at her fingers. “I guess it is, probably.”

“But I was—”

“No, Eric. You’re unfortunate, that’s all. Your brother has an illness. But you didn’t give it to him. No amount of sibling rivalry could have given him what he has. It’s chemical, completely biological.”

“He thinks I killed our sister,” he said. There was something in his voice. There was something almost like crying in my brother’s voice.

“Pilot is irrational, Eric.” Katherine touched him again. “He has all kinds of disordered, distorted thoughts.”

“Katherine, I understand these things. It’s just, it’s just that I guess I’m irrational about it, too. I mean, it’s different when it’s your own family.”

“You really are being irrational.”

“I can feel bad, can’t I?”

“You can.”

“I wish I could help him.”

“You’re helping him so much already.” Katherine held his hand. “You don’t even know.”

“What wouldn’t you do for your sister?”

“A lot,” Katherine said. She looked at the ocean. “There’s a great deal I haven’t done, as a matter of fact.”

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