Raising the Perfect Child Through Guilt and Manipulation by Elizabeth Beckwith

Author:Elizabeth Beckwith [Beckwith, Elizabeth]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Publisher: Harper Collins, Inc.
Published: 2009-09-21T16:00:00+00:00

The beautiful thing about “the look” is that it involves no words. So if your kid gets defensive at the sight of your piercing eyes and belts out a panicked, “What?!” you can calmly reply with the classic, “I didn’t say a word.” Which translates to, “You tell me!”

Places Where “the Look” Comes In Handy

Church or synagogue

Doctor’s waiting room

Rearview mirror

One of the many benefits of the nonverbal nature of “the look” is the psychological advantage it gives you. Your child is not sure how much you have seen or exactly what you know (this is closely tied to the mind control techniques we discussed in Chapter 6). This is perfect for when your kid is about to leave the house with a friend who you are suspicious of. Just shoot your child the simple version of “the look,” and instantly, he will be terrified that you know all about “Andy.” Now if he joins Andy in his devious adventures, he will be too paranoid to enjoy the ride, and will feel awful about himself afterward—thus inhibiting future juvenile escapades.

Similarly, this look is helpful when your kid is about to walk out the door with a date. I will never forget when I was a junior in high school and a guy who my parents had never met came to pick me up. He really Eddie Haskelled it, and my mom had a look on her face like, Is this kid full of shit or what? Later, when I came home, she was laughing as she put into words what her eyes had spoken earlier: “Was that guy a bullshit artist or what? Let me tell you something, Lizzie, anything that guy tells you, take it and divide it by twenty-five thousand, and maybe you’ll get somewhere near the truth.”

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