No Endings, Only Beginnings by Bernie S. Siegel & Cynthia J. Hurn

Author:Bernie S. Siegel & Cynthia J. Hurn [Bernie S. Siegel & Cynthia J. Hurn]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Hay House
Published: 2020-02-17T00:00:00+00:00

Learn to Love Yourself

A friend of mine, an industrialist in a large plant in Ohio, told me that the best workmen in his plant are those who get into harmony with the rhythm of the machine on which they are working. He declares that if a worker will work in harmony with the rhythm of his machine, he will not be tired at the end of the day. He points out that the machine is an assembling of parts according to the law of God.

– NORMAN VINCENT PEALE (1898-1993),

AMERICAN MINISTER AND AUTHOR OF THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING

Dr. Peale’s quote impacted me with its simple wisdom, for it is another great example of seeing God in everything. There is a divine order in creation and in all life. When we recognize this order, we are seeing the laws of nature, the laws of God, made manifest. Just as the mechanic works in harmony with his machine by learning and accepting what it can and cannot do, and maintaining it to keep it in optimum condition, so can we apply the same principle to our lives. When we live in harmony with our bodies, our unique personalities, and our God-given nature, we tire less, suffer less, feel happier, and stay healthier. This is what self-love is—not trying to be what we aren’t but learning what we are, appreciating and respecting our qualities and limitations, and taking care of ourselves as best we can.

One measure of self-love is in the choices we make for ourselves and whether those choices resonate or clash with our natures. Making choices isn’t always easy, especially if we haven’t had good models to learn from. In that case, we need to re-parent ourselves, seek better role models and coaches, and make new mottoes to live by. It takes time—sometimes several years—but we can do it.

I once knew a woman I will call “Rhonda” who had grown up in an abusive, alcoholic family. Not only that, but her parents and siblings had all committed suicide. Rhonda came to me suffering from scleroderma, a painful and disfiguring autoimmune disease that is treatable but not curable. Its impact on her was visible, and I could feel her disappointment in herself. Her parents’ suicide had left her child’s mind believing that she had failed as a child. I encouraged her to talk about her life while I just sat and listened. As she purged the painful memories, I could see the rage toward her parents and anger about her condition begin to leave her body. Rhonda came to realize that she couldn’t hang on to the past, keep blaming what she could not change, and then expect her body to react in a positive way. She agreed to start talking therapy, which opened a new path for her. She learned how to reassemble her feelings about her life so that the pieces she was given began working for—not against—her.

Later she wrote to me: “I had no control over the parents who

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