NLP For Parents by Judy Bartkowiak

Author:Judy Bartkowiak [Bartkowiak, Judy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-907685-47-7
Publisher: MX Publishing
Published: 2010-06-02T04:00:00+00:00

7) Look for the pay off

Sometimes as parents we find ourselves doing things we don’t want to do and may even feel resentful about. This could be something as major as a career change or work choice or it could be relatively minor such as changing nappies.

Whatever we do though, we can look for the positive intention by reframing it or looking at it from another angle. Be creative and find some good things about what you don’t like doing.

This is a great skill to teach children because they have less control over their environment than we do; so being able to put a positive gloss on unpleasant things will really help them through life.

The other way to use this skill is to reframe and look for the pay off in your children’s behaviour. When they are not doing what you’ve asked; consider what they are getting out of this behaviour. They may want your attention or they may know from experience that this behaviour will lead to you giving in and letting them have their own way. They may be expecting a bribe from you such as ‘if you stop this now, I’ll take you to McDonalds later’. If you make it worth their while to play up, then this is their positive intention or pay off.

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