Mug Exterminator by Joe Archibald (pdf)

Author:Joe Archibald (pdf) [Archibald, Joe]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2015-09-19T02:21:08+00:00

“You call Abigail about those teeth?” I

E GO to the Greek’s. Snooty is on

W

says to Snooty. “It costs real hay for a set his sixth beer, when he suddenly and how can she eat steak—?”

lets his washed-out blue eyes bug out.

We go to see Abigail the next “Let’s go to the cooler, Scoop. First I will afternoon and the old girl is busy with a stop in and get some caramels.”

racing form. She asks Snooty what he

“Look, our rent is paid up until the first thought about a piece of Slide Rule in the of the month,” I says. “She can’t put us sixth at Bowie.

out. We—”

“It would be just as good as the steak I I follow Snooty Piper. He stops in at a had on Avery Street last night,” Snooty

candy store and buys caramels. Then he

says. “As long as they did not leave none leads me to headquarters and he asks for of the harness on it. Oh, you are dopin’ the Iron Jaw. The big flatfoot comes out of the bangtails? I wish I had two bucks to put on grill room and he looks like he had been Cleopatra’s Needle in the third gallop. on the broiler. He wipes his dome and But-er-I came to return something to you.”

swears.

He digs down and pulls out the uppers

“Still can’t make him squawk, huh?”

wrapped in tissue paper. He displays them Snooty says. “Look, maybe I could soften to Abigail and she just stares at him.

him up, O’Shaughnessy. There is an old

“I should of returned them later,” rap I got wind of in Pennsylvania. A Snooty says. “They bit me the other night.

murder rap—”

I grabbed them before I left in case I got

“Y-you did?” Iron Jaw yelps. “Come

blood poison and needed doctors’ bills.”

in here, Piper.”

“You would put the bite on me, I bet,”

We go in. Mike Buzzati is sitting in a

Abigail says. “But I didn’t lose no teeth.

chair and two big gendarmes are still

My uppers are still doing business at the throwing the sixty-four dollar questions at old stand. It’s lowers I got, Piper. Say, I him. Mike is sweating, but his tongue is had a housekeeper six months ago that lost tied up like traffic on the road to a set of uppers. Found them in that chair Smolensk.

over there? Oh, I bet it was that little

“Okay, Piper. Tell him.”

pooch of mine, Harriet.”

“Here are some caramels, Mike,”

“Huh?”

Snooty says.

“That’s her chair, Piper. Everything

“T’anks, pal. You got a heart.” The

she finds out in the backyard, she brings in culprit grins and chews up two caramels.

and puts it into that chair. Look and see if “Piper, you said—!” Iron Jaw yelps.

there’s anything else there.”

Snooty says, “Come on, Scoop. He is

We do. We find a clothespin, an old

not the guy.”

rubber heel, an old bone, and a piece of Iron Jaw chases us half way across coal.

Tremont and only a beer truck saved us.

“She is a card,” Abigail says. “So you

Three blocks away, I get my breath and try thought you’d shake me down, Piper! to do to Snooty what Iron Jaw had in MUG EXTERMINATOR

7

mind.

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