Life In Flow by Kate Kendall

Author:Kate Kendall
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Allen & Unwin
Published: 2018-01-04T16:00:00+00:00

“Real life is right in front of you and I really want you to feel it, savour it and lean into it. Be you.”

Does your phone have the upper hand?

How’s your relationship with your phone?

Do you move from room to room in your own home with your phone in your hand?

Is checking it one of the first things you do in the morning (not to mention in the middle of the night)?

Do you freak out when you think you’ve lost it?

You could be addicted. Not joking. And in fact, many of us are.

And just like the chemistry of our chemicals, there’s science that goes with that.7,8

Each time we get a like on Facebook or Instagram, it triggers a chemical response and releases dopamine – that feel-good hormone. The more comments and likes we get, the more we crave that feeling. It’s no wonder you often find yourself checking your phone a thousand times a day – especially if you’re feeling down. It’s because you’re after that feel-good dopamine hit.

Sometimes I even wonder if I own my iPhone or the iPhone owns me.

This tiny little thing that sits patiently in our handbag or pocket is pure genius. It does pretty much everything from paying bills to ordering food to wasting your time for at least an hour a day on Instagram. It’s no wonder that when you lose it (or think you’ve lost it, only to find that it was ‘hiding’ in your handbag) you freak the hell out.

Guilty as charged.

For me, part of that panic is the cost, time and effort associated with the thought of having to get a new one. And the other very big part of it is the thought of being isolated from the rest of the world until it’s replaced.

But the thing is – the rest of the world is right in front of us, if only we could look up and around for long enough.

And you know, after the initial freak out, the moments spent phone free are rather liberating. Not being tethered to your phone has many upsides.

Fewer distractions.

A break for your nervous system.

Less comparison.

More real-time connection with the people in front of you.

Better for your posture and eyes (these are only two of the health benefits).

So maybe we need to look at our relationship with technology.

When you’re with friends, how much of that time do you (and they) spend with phone in hand?

When you’re with your partner, does one of you or both of you spend much of your quality time together on the phone? And how does that feel? Does it have an impact on the relationship? Do you feel closer for it or more distant?

Disconnected. Unrecognised. Separated.

These were words some of my friends responded with when I asked the above questions.

I think sitting together in silence is way more profound than filling the space with tech time.

Change the way you use your phone and watch your relationships change – including your relationship to self.

I really worry, in particular, about teenage

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