Lies We Tell Mothers: A True Story by Suzy K Quinn

Author:Suzy K Quinn [Quinn, Suzy K]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
ISBN: 9781542044677
Published: 2019-07-31T16:00:00+00:00

#21 LIE – BABY-LED WEANING IS MUCH EASIER

So we were stuck. Trapped in a life that didn’t suit us any more, but not knowing how to move forwards. We didn’t want to leave the city. We loved the city. But it wasn’t right for us now.

What should we do?

We didn’t know.

And then something happened that made up our minds for us.

A chickpea.

Before you laugh, this is a serious business. Life-threatening, even.

One day (my birthday, to be precise – but who cares about your birthday when you have kids?), I was wandering around one of Brighton’s many organic supermarkets, prodding the spelt loaves and wondering why people buy goat’s milk yoghurt (something to do with lactose digestion, apparently).

It was nearly lunchtime and Lexi was getting grizzly. She was just over one, fully weaned on to solid food and these days she needed a full meal at lunchtime – preferably something hot.

I thought about the leaky Tupperware tub rattling around under the buggy. It contained last night’s lasagne, mashed into a revolting meaty paste.

I’ll have to get that out and give Lexi lunch in a minute, I thought. What a pain in the arse. I wish we could go back to just breastfeeding.

Then I remembered about baby-led weaning. I’m sure you know what this is, but if you don’t, let me describe it for you: ‘Purees and mashed foods are unnecessary. You don’t need to blend anything. Babies can suck and gnaw at whole food items, like bread and fruit. Their little gums will mash everything up and eventually the food will disintegrate. Much less work for you, only make sure you cover your child, the high chair, floor and yourself with five metres of wipe-clean plastic.’

I could try that baby-led weaning today, I thought. It sounds a lot easier than messing around with lasagne mush.

At this point we were swinging by the fresh-beans aisle (they have those in organic supermarkets) and a shop attendant offered us a raw soaked chickpea.

‘Perfect!’ I said. ‘A little snack to keep us going. Lexi, suck on this while I prod the spelt bread.’

I gave Lexi the chickpea, imagining it to be soft and yielding.

I was wrong.

It turns out soaked chickpeas are as hard as nuts.

Lexi began to choke, wheeze and turn bright red.

It’s true what they say about awful things happening in slow motion. I remember every second of Lexi choking, and the overwhelming panic and powerlessness.

Lexi turned redder and redder, her throat rasping, her eyes wide with terror.

It was awful. The absolute worst moment of my life.

‘Help!’ I begged the wide-eyed deli man. ‘Call an ambulance!’

The deli-counter man threw down his large olive spoon, pulled a mobile phone from his striped apron and placed the emergency call in three seconds flat.

Moments later an ambulance sped to a halt outside the supermarket.

Thank you, deli-counter man. Thank you, NHS.

The paramedic team put an oxygen mask on Lexi and shone a torch in her mouth.

‘She’s getting a significantly reduced amount of oxygen,’ they said. ‘But she’s still breathing.

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