How Did I Get to Be 40 & Other Atrocities by Judith Viorst

Author:Judith Viorst
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster

Open House

Everyone is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Stones,

Who stopped being the Stones when she started saying that the trouble with America was the CIA and the FBI and the exploitation of lettuce growers and Indians, and

He started saying the trouble was not enough tennis courts, but

Everyone else is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Hoyts,

Who stopped being the Hoyts when they started saying that just because a husband and wife are sexually unfaithful doesn’t mean that they’re being unfaithful emotionally, but

Everyone else is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Kings,

Who stopped being the Kings when she decided that every time she told him something sensitive and deep he didn’t get it, and

He decided that every time he told her something funny she didn’t get it, but

Everyone else is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Youngs,

Who stopped being the Youngs when she started law school,

And he started saying the house is never clean,

And she started saying why don’t you clean it yourself,

And he started saying that women should clean and men should go to law school, but

Everyone else is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Clarks,

Who stopped being the Clarks when she decided to seek inner peace through wheat germ and meditation, and

He decided to seek inner peace through Gay Lib, but

Everyone else is coming to our party,

Everyone, that is, except the Greens,

Who stopped being the Greens when they sold their house and moved to the country to rediscover each other, and rediscovered they didn’t agree about garlic. Or Woody Allen.

Or Scrabble, her father, cloth napkins, or psychoanalysis.

Or when is the music so loud that it’s giving you headaches.

Or when is a room so ice-cold that your fingers get numb, but

Everyone else is coming to our party.

I hope we’ll be there.

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