For All of Us by Jillian Rose

Author:Jillian Rose [Rose, Jillian]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Stony Iron Publishing
Published: 2024-01-28T00:00:00+00:00

19

Present Day

I’m not sure where to begin; how to wade through the grandeur of it all. With every answer I discovered, I have countless other questions. I don’t even begin to decipher how to navigate this new reality that I sit in, what tomorrow will bring, or the day after that. In this moment, I am fully here, paying reverence to the gift of enlightenment that I have been given, appreciating the monumental emotions moving through me, on each end of a very wide spectrum, and not taking any of this miraculous experience for granted.

I can only imagine what this must be like for Kai. I have no idea how long he has held this, if it feels like relief to no longer be alone in it, or if it feels more treacherous because of how unknown the future is. I also don’t know what else he has seen. How intricate of a story has been shown to him. I want to know everything. Every single detail and joy and pain. I thought this would help me close a door but instead, it has presented me with hundreds more.

He has been silent, watching me work my thoughts through a brain that wasn’t prepared to live within a new reality so suddenly, comfortable with the perspective it had functioned within up to this point, and exhausted by the thought of transforming around a new one. But my heart is wholly alive. It is grateful that I have woken up. It is mingling with my soul in a whole new way—a soul that I’ve just learned has been reincarnated throughout a vast and labyrinthine eternity, and one I’m sure has always tried to find its way to his.

“How long have you known?” I ask him.

“In a way, I think I have always known. I always felt this longing for something I did not understand. When I was a child, I grew up in a Catholic household, and the only way I knew to communicate with the great beyond was through prayer. So, I would pray and talk about the empty spaces inside of me. I knew there was something I was meant to discover—that there were things meant to be deciphered—but I couldn’t understand the language of my soul. I was only consoled when connecting with something that I believed was outside of myself.”

I feel mesmerized by his words; learning about these details of what makes him up. I can imagine him, young and searching. I can picture him as he learns to move about the world, aware that he is different than others around him. I wonder how many times our souls have nearly crossed paths, if we ever occupied similar spaces, breathed the same particles of air.

“And then, when I was in college, I had my first psychedelic experience with psilocybin. A few friends and I ate a heroic dose of magic mushrooms in the woods, and though they were just looking to get high, I was searching. And that is the first time, in this lifetime, that I saw you.

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