Eyes Have I That See by John Julian

Author:John Julian
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781612617145
Publisher: Paraclete Press

Aldonza:

To reach back and down

for roots

is hollow as theology.

I spring more deeply

than man or woman thinks,

and find my tap root

sucks its being

from the Styx:

Charon great-grandfathered me

before the hordes

of others.

I was umothered,

so do I unmother me,

and, remembering no birth,

I will not bear.

No man-child will come out of me

as men too often enter.

None of myself will I give

to a world

that hated me enough

to make me be.

I will be party

to the feel and the condition

my twisted genes assigned.

This heritage I never knew

could carry with the blood,

but here I am:

of a clod, a clod;

of a flesh, a flesh,

of the body of a whore, a whore—

and a good one—

the best beneath the queen.

I come from the soil,

from the people

and the mud.

You all made me,

as you made the witch last spring,

and you will burn me, too,

when you can’t stand

to be without me anymore,

when you have worked your own enchantment

and need to destroy your sins.

The end of me

will be a genesis,

but the constant “Why?”

will epitaph my dust

until you all are dead

who live my death.

I am from you—

and bless you with a curse

from here

within my daily grave.

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