Do I Need a Divorce to Be Happy? by Grayner Teri;

Author:Grayner, Teri; [Teri Grayner]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Morgan James Publishing
Published: 2020-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 4:

Melissa’s Story

Just to catch you up on what went on with Melissa after she told me about her sleepless nights: she did continue to wrestle with conflicting thoughts running through her mind. She began the practice of morning meditations and journaling at night and even jotting down her thoughts during the day when they came to her.

Then one day it became apparent to her that she was really just tired of lying to herself. She asked herself many times if she should continue to hide these feelings and thoughts that she was no longer happy with their long-term retirement plan from John.

She knew that John would not be happy, so she decided to go to counseling to work through her own personal struggles with her individuality. Melissa had a difficult childhood and brought a lot of baggage into her relationship with John, so over time it became more difficult to identify if John was the problem or if how she perceived her situation was the real problem.

After six months in counseling she discovered that she had a lump on her breast. She knew that now she had to see her primary care doctor to possibly initiate a series of doctor’s visits to take care of herself. It was evident to her that she had stuffed her feelings for too long. Imagine the things she began to discover when she attended her regular counseling sessions.

Melissa, who appeared to be meek to some and a pushover to others, had now gone from being a part of everyone else’s life to putting herself first in her own life.

She returned to work and put the baby in daycare because she knew it was what needed to be done. There was no turning back and she couldn’t look at John to blame him for being overly focused on work and their retirement plan. He had worked hard and deserved to keep their plans on track. But what he did not see coming was Melissa’s illness.

If you recall what I had mentioned earlier in the book, that if you continue to hold space for what no longer serves you, the universe will collapse your current plans (since they no longer serve you) and present you with something more complicated.

Well, both John and Melissa had to learn how to work together to get Melissa through her breast cancer diagnosis. John had to hire someone to come into their home and help Melissa with the children and housework. That person stayed longer hours as Melissa progressed with her treatments and additional surgeries.

Melissa and John both realized that if they were going to have each other in their lives for the long term they were going to have to work harder now more than ever. Melissa made time for herself to practice her self-care routines of meditation and journaling while she focused on getting well.

Melissa’s family that lived nearby came to visit more frequently and helped with the children on the weekends. Overall, their family grew stronger in the throes of adversity.

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