Diary of a Parent Trainer by Jennifer Smith

Author:Jennifer Smith
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9780375988943
Publisher: Random House Children's Books
Published: 2012-06-11T21:00:00+00:00

10:45 a.m.

I got back from Hannah’s to find Mandy waiting for me in the hall, wearing her T-shirt with the giant logo on it.

“Stuart’s here! Go up and get into your T-shirt with the logo on it!” she hissed. “I’ve got Mum wearing hers.”

I ran up and changed, then sauntered into the kitchen, where Stuart was happily drinking a cup of coffee as if it was his kitchen. He noticed my T-shirt but didn’t say anything, just blinked a couple of times. Me, Mum and Mandy looked like a logo convention.

“Don’t worry, Katie,” he said, in Friendly Mode. “I’m not here to monopolize your mum, I just came round to see if Jack would like to go fishing! The stuff’s in the car.”

FRIENDLY MODE

This is not a bad mode for Grown-Ups to be in. It means they are doing their best to make you and other people like them … which makes your life a whole lot easier.

So there was Stuart, in full Friendly Mode. Yeah, right! In full Lying Mode, more like. As if he really wanted to spend time alone with Jack, the burping boy of Brindleton. It’s so obvious he’s just doing it to get in Mum’s good books.

“You’ve got a car?” Jack pushed past Stuart and ran outside, where there was a little red vintage sports car, a Triumph Spitfire with its top down and some fishing rods sticking out of the back. I couldn’t believe it! Normally Stuart gets the bus. He’s been keeping this from us. More lies! And how hypocritical—going on about the environment and secretly keeping a gas-guzzling sports car!

“Yes,” said Stuart proudly, “meet my other girlfriend. Been off the road a few months, you know what these old cars are like. But now she’s running like a dream.”

Mum stood in the door of our house holding Rascal and looking worryingly impressed by Stuart’s cool car.

“Can I go fishing, Mum?” Jack turned to Mum, his eyes shining. At this point Mandy made a harrumph noise and stomped into the house.

“Of course you can,” said Mum, “just be back for lunch. I’ll make something special—you’ll be hungry with all that fresh air.”

Stuart tried to look pleased at the thought. Lies upon lies upon lies!

“Now we can have a morning with just the girls!” started Mum, but at that moment Mandy reappeared in the hallway.

“I’m off to Lucy’s house,” she said, bad-temperedly pushing out of the door. “I’ll be back at lunchtime.”

“But, Mandy …”

It was too late. Mandy was gone.

“Looks like it’s just the two of us,” I said.

“Great,” said Mum, in Friendly Mode, “how about painting our toenails?”

USEFUL HINT

If your Grown-Up is in Friendly Mode and wants to spend some time with you, humor them. The useful bonding experience should make them much easier to operate to your advantage.

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