Cannibal She-Devils of the Umpopo Delta by Peter Caffrey

Author:Peter Caffrey [Caffrey, Peter]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Mondo Perverso
Published: 2023-10-15T00:00:00+00:00

A LIGHT LUNCH

‘To be fair, Brother Michael is more tender, but Father Aloysius had a bit more favour,’ Bernard said, chewing the meat off the bone. Once again, he’d been the only one of the men to accept the food offered by the warrior women.

Patrick and Sebastian ignored him, still traumatised by hearing the dying screams of their comrade as he’d been impaled. Once Bernard had finished his food, the guard tied him to the stake once more and left the three men alone.

‘The only way we have any chance to get out of this alive is to take our pegging, produce a good load of spunk, and they’ll keep us as breeding stock,’ Bernard said.

‘Never,’ Sebastian replied. ‘I will die for my faith.’

‘Rather you than me,’ Bernard said. ‘I’ll be honest, I’ve never had anything shoved up my arse before, but I’d take a pegging to stay alive. I wouldn’t mind a go on the queen either.’

‘What?’ Sebastian snapped. ‘It would be a mortal sin.’

‘It would be,’ Bernard argued, ‘but it would mean I’d stay alive. On the balance of things, that’s enough for me.’

‘You’d trade eternal life at God’s right hand for a few more years on earth?’ Sebastian asked, shocked at Bernard’s attitude.

‘Yes, I would.’

‘But during holy orders, you pledged your life to God.’

‘People say a lot of things they don’t mean,’ Bernard said. ‘For starters, it probably helps if you believe in all the Heaven and Hell tosh. Do I really think there are caverns of eternal fire, manned by a chap with cloven hooves and a pitchfork? I might have when I was six, but not today. That sort of faith isn’t worth a gamble on, not when it means I’ll be cooked alive by a bunch of saucy cannibal she-devils. You might see martyrdom as a look you can carry off, but I don’t, and Patrick feels the same.’

‘When did I say that?’ Patrick asked aggressively.

‘Don’t play the sanctimonious monk with me,’ Brother Bernard said with a mocking grin. ‘I followed you back in Titti Boner, and I saw what you did with those boys. I reckon when the beast-woman sticks her strap-on up your arsehole, it won’t even touch the sides.’

‘Oh, for fuck’s sake,’ Sebastian roared. ‘What did you do in Titti Boner? Is that why we’re being killed off, because you upset the locals?’

‘It was a misunderstanding,’ Patrick said.

‘Yeah,’ Bernard replied with a snort. ‘He misunderstood that shooting his load into a little boy’s mouth isn’t a smart move in a country filled with fucking cannibal savages.’

‘Listen,’ Patrick said, trying to inject some calm into the discussion. ‘I think Bernard’s right. We must try and win over these she-devils. It’s senseless us all dying for no real reason.’

‘You call defending the faith no real reason?’ Sebastian asked.

Before Patrick could answer, he spotted two guards approaching. They strode purposefully over to the stakes and glared at the three men.

‘Now your leader has gone, who’s in charge?’ one with heavily tattooed breasts asked.

Both Patrick and Bernard nodded towards Sebastian and said, ‘He is.

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