Babyproofing Your Marriage: How to Laugh More and Argue Less as Your Family Grows by Stacie Cockrell & Cathy O'Neill & Julia Stone & Rosario Camacho-Koppel

Author:Stacie Cockrell & Cathy O'Neill & Julia Stone & Rosario Camacho-Koppel
Language: eng
Format: mobi
ISBN: 9780061173554
Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks
Published: 2008-02-05T05:00:00+00:00

144

Babyproofi ng Your Marriage

. . . Five Minutes Later

Get Out of Mommy Mode: Reclaim Your Sexuality

The whole blowjob thing is well and good. It works, but that’s slightly

beside the point. It’s a stopgap. A Band-Aid. The real questions are a lot

harder. Girls, don’t we all deserve to have a good sex life? Shouldn’t we

aspire to have great sex rather than marriage-maintenance sex? Or at least

to have great sex a few times a year?

• What makes you feel sexy these days?

•

What

would

really put you in the mood?

The three of us asked ourselves these questions and couldn’t answer them.

We looked at each other blankly. We stared at the ceiling. The girl who

used to feel that way seemed like an old friend we hadn’t heard from in

a long time. Men are not miracle workers. If we do nothing to maintain

our sense of self and just surrender completely to being Mommies, how

can we expect them to make us feel sexy and desirable? We all have to

pull ourselves far enough out of the mommy vacuum to reclaim at least

a portion of our sexual, vital selves.

We asked our friends what they do to get themselves in the mood.

Here are some of their recommendations:

The “Sex Life” of New Parents

145

“We get a room in a hotel. The sex is great and the room service

is even better.”

“I read a dirty beach book or sometimes even The Joy of Sex

(best done with a glass of wine) and earmark the pages for him

to read.”

“I wear sexy underwear all day. I splurge a little on this. If you’re

going to do this, don’t cheap out, because by 6:00 p.m., you’ll

feel itchy, not sexy.”

“Sometimes I go to bed naked. My husband likes the ‘surprise’

when he gets in bed, and it helps me get revved up faster.”

“When I am in the changing room at the gym I take a good look

at the other women. This is what real women look like. Not like

the stick insects in magazines and on television. I realize that I

look better than a lot of them.”

“I like it when my husband acts like he really wants me—

especially when we’re out somewhere like the mall and he can’t

do anything about it. The gleam in his eye is a turn-on for me.”

“When we go out to parties, I like to flirt (tastefully, of course)

with the other men there. It reminds me of my old self. It’s

nice to get a little attention. It also reminds me why I like my

husband so much.”

“God, don’t tell anyone, but we watch the dirty-movie channels

in our bedroom late at night. Just a couple of minutes of that

pretty much gets me raring to go, even if I wasn’t in the mood

before.”

Strike While the Iron (Psst, That’s You, Honey) Is Hot

“Sometimes I take the sexual initiative just because I know that

he needs it. On average I would say half the time. Usually, if I

give him the ball he runs with it.”

—Marianne, married 12 years, 5 kids

How often have you initiated sex in the last six months? In the last six

years? Most of us never do.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.