As Good as It Gets by Romesh Ranganathan

Author:Romesh Ranganathan [Ranganathan, Romesh]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Topic, Entertainment & Performing Arts, General, Biography & Autobiography, Personal Memoirs, Celebrity & Popular Culture, Humor, Social Science, Popular Culture
ISBN: 9781473579026
Publisher: Random House
Published: 2020-10-14T23:00:00+00:00

Alcohol Abuse

The relationship I have with alcohol is problematic. I don’t mean alcoholism, which is a horrible illness, but I do mean that over the years I have found what it does to me and my behaviour horrendous, and I’m frequently reminded that it brings out the worst in everyone.

Almost without exception, every single evening I have had with alcohol has been great to shit in a ratio of about 1:3. It varies in terms of levels of smashed as you get older, but the pattern stays very similar. There is the beginning bit of the evening where you meet up with everyone and you all know that getting drunk is the eventual goal. Conversation is stilted as everyone is really waiting for the drink to kick in, ‘banter’ to start and inhibitions to disappear.

After that, there is a section of the evening when you are perfectly drunk. You feel a buzz, you are happy, and everyone seems charming and hilarious, and in particular you. You are having the time of your life and can’t believe you don’t do this every single night. I remember in my twenties, for about two years, there would be a point in every evening where my friends and I would tell each other that we loved each other, and despite the fact that we always did that when we went out on the piss, every time would feel like the first time any of us had said it.

What would be ideal would be if you could keep the evening at that point. If, like a shower hitting its set temperature, you could keep it perfectly in that moderately drunk stage, and spend the rest of the evening not necessarily telling people you love them constantly but sitting in that zone. Sadly I reckon that has only ever happened about three times in my life.

What actually happens is you try to keep that buzz going but take it way too far. Suddenly, you find yourself feeling more and more aggressive, you start making terrible decisions, and the evening ends with you puking up into a recycling bin behind the KFC. One of your friends tries to help you and you tell them this is typical of them and how you’ve actually never liked them.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve made a prick of myself as a result of overdrinking. One night last year, I decided I needed to stop. I didn’t make a big show of telling all my friends, I just decided I was going give up the booze and if anyone asked about it I’d pretend I had to do it for work. There are various reasons I decided to stop drinking. One of them was the fact that I seem to think I’m a lot funnier when I’m drunk. My anecdotes get louder, my listening gets rarer, and I essentially become an obnoxious twat.

What’s obviously worse is the fear you feel the next morning as you try to recall what you’ve done.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.