Apex Magazine by Jason Sizemore

Author:Jason Sizemore
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: apex publications, apex book company, apex magazine, jason sizemore, sf magazine, apex magazine issue 89, scifi magazine
Publisher: Apex Book Company

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Seconds and eternity fused into an indistinguishable whole, so much so that when Jay emerged from the doldrums of his mind, he wasn’t sure how much time had passed. He remembered little of the journey home, except that memories of Malaya no longer comforted him anymore, having been razed by figments of how she’d killed his mother. Only hours ago, he would have done anything to say one last goodbye; now he didn’t know if he could even bear the sight of her.

He arrived at the outskirts of the shantytown by daybreak. Quiet filled the empty streets and alleyways, a tainted calm that reminded him of graveyards, or an ancient battlefield where the bodies of the dead had been left to rot. Whenever a stray voice did slip out from the shanties around him, it felt like an aberration, spectral words spilling from another realm.

A sense of unreality bled into his surroundings when he reached his house. Colors faded, objects distorted with exaggerated proportions, and the ground thumped against his feet as if it had acquired its own heartbeat. He hesitated by the entrance and stared up into the sky.

“Mahal na Panginoon, give me the strength to do this,” he said and muscled through the door.

The stench of rot assaulted him. In the far corner, Malaya cradled the real body of his mother. Blood pooled around them, was smeared across Malaya’s face; her lips and teeth were stained with it, her hands wearing it like gloves.

Vomit burned his throat, flooding his mouth. While he’d believed his aswang-mother’s story, knowing the details only magnified the revulsion of seeing it for himself.

“Why would you do this?” he said, hunched over, spitting sour bile to the floor.

“I’m sorry!” Malaya shouted. “I’m sorry!”

She pushed his mother’s body aside, wedging herself farther into the corner, shielding her face with her arms.

“I’m your husband,” he said, pounding his chest with a fist. “I’m the one you loved the most. You should have only wanted me!”

He advanced on her, not caring for the consequences. Even if she tried to rip his still-beating heart from his chest, he wouldn’t struggle, or even cry out. It would be a mercy, an end to all the pain and confusion glutting up his insides. He stooped and grabbed her arms, forcing them to part, fully expecting her proboscis to thrust into his belly. To his surprise, he found only black tears sliding down her cheeks.

“I don’t understand. Why don’t you kill me? It’s what you want, isn’t it? My blood, filling you up to bursting.”

“I’m too … full. The hungers gone, at least for now.”

He scoffed, shoved her hard against the wall and backed away. “This isn’t how it was supposed to be.”

“I never meant to hurt anyone,” Malaya said, “much less you and Mom. For days I traveled home, thinking about this very moment. With every step, I swore I’d be a good wife and daughter-in-law, not a monster like all the rest. But there’s something else inside me now, a blinding lust beyond anything I could have ever imagined.

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