Analog SFF, November 2007 by Dell Magazine Authors

Author:Dell Magazine Authors
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Science Fiction
Publisher: Dell Magazines
Published: 2010-12-15T07:07:49.691000+00:00

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Short Story: YEARNING FOR THE WHITE AVENGER

by CARL FREDERICK

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Illustration by Nicholas Jainschigg

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Some things are best done in stages...

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“You don't like Brussels sprouts,” said the parrot.

Conradin gazed over at the perch in surprise, and also embarrassment. For the first time, he'd been invited to dinner by his best friend, Henry, and he wanted to make a good impression.

Henry laughed. “Mom trained her to say that.” He seemed pleased with himself. “Because of me."

Mrs. Wolverton smiled. “It's all right, Conradin,” she said. “Most eleven-year-old boys aren't nuts about Brussels sprouts.” She threw a glance at her son. “Henry certainly isn't."

Conradin balled a fist with the hand on his lap. “But how—"

“I saw what you did,” said the parrot.

“What?” Conradin felt his face flush with guilt; when Mrs. Wolverton had gone out to bring in the dessert, he'd slid a Brussels sprout back into the serving bowl. And now the parrot was telling on him.

“You must have made a fist,” said Mrs. Wolverton. “Shadow's trained to say that when she sees someone making a fist."

Conradin stared at her and wrinkled his nose in puzzlement.

“It was for a crime show."

“Oh,” said Conradin, still mystified.

“Mom trains animals for TV.” Henry wiggled a finger at Shadow. “African Grey parrots are smart."

“I didn't think they were that smart.” Conradin nodded over at the dog watching alertly from just outside the no-begging zone: a black and white Border collie with half-perked ears and dark brown eyes. “Anyway, I thought dogs were smarter than birds."

“They are. Watch this!” Henry slid his chair back a few inches, then turned toward the dog. “Sniffles,” he said, “do you want some people food?"

Sniffles, whining, made twitching motions. In spite of the dog's lack of speech, Conradin had no difficulty understanding him.

“Then bring over your bowl."

Sniffles ran out of the dining room and a few seconds later, returned with a dog bowl in his teeth. He paused at the no-begging boundary and, after Henry nodded, raced up to the table. Henry put some lamb chop scraps in the bowl and told Sniffles to eat it in the kitchen. Sniffles, with the bowl in his teeth, dashed out of the dining room.

“Geez!” said Conradin.

“Where is Sniffles going?” said the parrot.

“Wow!” said Conradin. “These guys are smart as people."

Mrs. Wolverton put down her fork. “It's body language, mostly. Dogs and birds are sharp observers. We can train them so they seem very intelligent."

“But Sniffles and Shadow are intelligent,” said Henry, glancing at the parrot. “African Greys are Einstein parrots and some Border Collies can understand over four hundred words. They can't talk, but they're super intelligent."

“Oh, I wouldn't go that far,” said Mrs. Wolverton. “Intelligence is a word covering many meanings. There really should be a lot of different words.” She regarded the parrot. “But whether Shadow knows what she's saying—probably not, but who knows?"

Just then, Sniffles padded back in.

“Good dog,” said Henry. “You can come up to the table now."

Sniffles, tail wagging, darted up between Conradin and Henry.

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