An Introduction to Tantra and Sacred Sexuality by Michael Mirdad

Author:Michael Mirdad
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Grail Press

The Role of a Sexual Partner,

Healer or Therapist

Who facilitates sexual healing? There are counselors who specialize in this field, as well as individuals who have studied the arts of sacred sexuality. The latter group has much to offer, but a background in the psychology of trauma is highly recommended. Additionally, a friend or partner can learn some of the exercises to assist in facilitating the healing process.

There are, nonetheless, some hazards and potential pitfalls in having a friend or partner acting as the healer, rather than a therapist. If things go well, the healer often becomes the object of “transference.” In this case, the client believes his or her newfound awakening is inseparably attached to the healer. On the other hand, if deep wounds are awakened, and a friend or partner is assisting the healing process, then the recipient of sexual therapy might “project” some of the hurt and rage onto the loved one. This, of course, could ruin their relationship. It is also possible to have a mixture of transference and projection.

There are precautions that can be taken to avoid the inherent pitfalls of sexual therapy. Yet, with such a taboo subject embodying so many deep issues, there are no guarantees of avoiding transference and projection. In fact, in the practice of Tantra, it’s often expected that a student will become attracted (if not attached) to the teacher. This attraction is seen as a natural part of a student’s awakening process. If treated responsibly by both parties, it can become a valuable tool to deepen their mutual vulnerability and trust.

For sexuality to reach a level worthy of being called sacred, it takes the cooperation of healthy and aware partners and healers. This healthy attitude includes unconditional love together with the willingness to develop specific skills and learn the necessary exercises for their roles as partners, healers or therapists. Last, but not least, for partners or healers to be truly effective, they must have clear boundaries and their personal needs and issues healed (or healing).

THINGS A PARTNER OR SEXUAL HEALER

SHOULD AVOID

1. Making sex (in any form) the goal of encounters.

2. Making orgasms the goal of sexual encounters.

3. Ignoring the needs of a partner or client.

4. Ignoring the issues, inhibitions, and tensions of a partner or client.

5. Disconnecting or losing the ability to remain present with a partner or client.

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