The Theft by Aaron Frale

Author:Aaron Frale [Frale, Aaron]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-10-02T16:00:00+00:00

32. I’ve always wondered why they call it army crawl. I imagine the Marine crawl isn’t too different. It’s not like there are high-ranking officials who tell their soldiers in the heat of battle, “Don’t crawl like that! You’re a Marine. You don’t want to be mistaken for an Army guy. Stand tall with your head—” He was cut off because he was shot in the head. See what I did there?

33. Thrust would no doubt have agreed.

34. Ouch

35. The funny part would be that Baker was actually given a name, like Thomas Baker or something. The parents didn’t know that their little Tommy would one day become the largest weed dealer in Colorado, who was about to turn his criminal enterprise into a legit business and made the mistake of announcing it on YouTube one day too early. Baker: Look at all this weed, bro. I’m going to be rich.

36. If dating apps wrote profiles using impartial third-party private detectives, some people would never date. Snorts cocaine in the bathroom. Gets drunk enough to pee in the bed. Verbally abuses partner. Has multiple partners unaware of each other. But they’re hot. Definitely gonna swipe right on this one.

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