The Legend of the Worst Boy in the World by Eoin Colfer

Author:Eoin Colfer [Colfer,Eoin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780141916941
Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd
Published: 2011-09-20T04:00:00+00:00

What I didn’t know was that when we were playing Up the Jumper, the second person in the jumper was hidden from anyone behind. Gran and Mum could only see Marty now, and must have thought that I had climbed into the playpen with Donnie.

Marty knocked on the back of my head, and because my arm was in his sleeve, I knocked on my head too.

‘Stand on my feet,’ he ordered.

‘Feet, Mary,’ I agreed and put my blue boots on his trainers. I was not always able to pronounce Marty properly when I was two, so I often called him Mary, which he didn’t like very much.

‘Marty! Mar-tee! Yes, walking the line. We have to go through the gates.’

I was horrified. ‘Gates?’

‘Yes. Through the gates. Now are you coming or not?’

‘Coming,’ I said. Even though we were not allowed through the gates, I didn’t want to miss out on the best straight line in the world.

‘Good. Well, shush then. This is supposed to be a secret game.’

I shushed. Everyone knew that secret games were the best ones. Even a two-year-old knew that.

So Marty walked out the back door, into our yard. From there he went around the side and used a stick to open the safety gate. Five years later, HP would use that same stick to open the gate. It was a sturdy stick.

Once he had the safety gate open, Marty pulled up his jumper and I spilled out.

‘OK, blue bunny,’ he said. ‘Run after Marty.’

‘Run after Mary,’ I said, climbing to my feet. I was getting quite excited. The best straight line in the world was nearby. In my two-year-old brain, I imagined a glowing white line in the sky. It tied itself up like a shoelace, but instead of a double bow, it had a face.

‘Hurry,’ said Marty, aware that Mum might discover our jailbreak any second.

I trotted after Marty, bunny ears jiggling, down the drive to the front gate. This was the edge of my daily world. I had never been past the front gate without a grown-up.

‘Gate,’ I said nervously.

‘Gate,’ agreed Marty, wrapping both hands around the sprung catch. He swung on that catch like a monkey, until his weight dragged it down. This was a valuable skill indeed. Who knows how long Marty had been escaping to the outside world this way.

The gate swung open, and it seemed to me that the noise from outside suddenly got a lot louder.

‘Mummy,’ I said, lip quivering.

Marty knew he was on the verge of losing me and had to think fast.

‘Look!’ he shouted, pointing. ‘The line!’

‘Line!’ I squeaked in delight, and followed Marty through the gateway, into the forbidden zone.

Our house was in a brand-new estate, in the middle of a brand-new part of town. All around us were mini-mountains of sand and giant cubes of blocks.

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