Stand by Your Manhood by Peter Lloyd

Author:Peter Lloyd [Lloyd, Peter]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Reference, Personal & Practical Guides, Social Science, Popular Culture, Men's Studies
ISBN: 9781849548526
Google: K8-yBQAAQBAJ
Amazon: B00Q1ULQMY
Publisher: Biteback Publishing
Published: 2014-11-26T16:00:00+00:00

Nine months later, Guy – less carefree man about town, more tasered single dad – graciously offered his ex and her new boyfriend £25,000 to fund a deposit on a home. They accepted, of course, but the Child Support Agency quickly ruled the generous sum was a ‘gift’ and could not be considered financial support for the baby, even though it was accompanied by a legal contract which described it so. The upshot? Guy was swiftly relieved of an additional £400 every month for eighteen years, totalling more than £100,000.

That’s expensive sex.

Things went from bad to worse when his ex, who shall remain nameless, had two more children with her new boyfriend, which rendered Guy an immediate imperfection on their family portrait. Despite his best efforts to remain in the picture, including three court rulings that assured Sunday custody every other weekend – what a privilege! – she rewrote genetic history and dwindled his access to nothing: a christening took place without him, phone calls went unanswered and long-standing plans were suddenly scuppered at the last minute, never to be rescheduled. His money was welcome, but he wasn’t.

The last time he saw his daughter was in a grey, lifeless supervision centre in Oxford, where he was forbidden from even taking her to the bathroom. That was fourteen years ago.

Caught in a pincer movement, he quickly built a legal case with a pricey City lawyer, hoping that if he kept calm, played by the rules and threw money at the problem, British justice would surely prevail. Sadly, in the words of The Clash, he fought the law and the law won. Having spent £50,000 on thirty-eight court appearances, his role was effectively erased by the state. His final, make-or-break battle took place on the same day two American Airlines planes crashed into New York’s Twin Towers.

‘That was my own personal 9/11,’ he says.

My ex was very well researched and played the system brilliantly. She knew a judge wouldn’t jail her because she’s a mother. They never do. Instead, he implemented a random two-year ‘cooling-off period’ because she was – in his words – ‘implacably hostile’. It meant she could edit me from my daughter’s life and I wouldn’t be allowed to complain. There would be no threat of jail for her – even though she’d already disregarded existing court orders, no appeal, no intervention and absolutely no contact, during which time she could easily move away and start a new life. It was like state-sanctioned kidnapping.

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